Thursday, July 7, 2011

3 Reasons 'Monte Carlo' Was Painful to Sit Through

So, obviously I did not expect a fulfilling cinematic experience while watching the teen comedy 'Monte Carlo' but what I did expect was a sugary sweet tale of 3 girls gallivanting through Europe - an empty but entertaining plot (cue doppelganger hijinks). Of course the only real reason I would sit through such nonsense is a hot guy (cue Cory Monteith) - but I have to admit it totally wasn't worth it. Here is why it was painful to sit through:

1. It wasn't a comedy or even remotely entertaining - I've never really understood the worlds fascination with Paris - other than the Louvre, I found nothing exciting at all. This film certainly didn't convince me otherwise....the girls choose a misguided tour that takes them through the Paris sights before you can blink - you would think that through this we would get at least some beautiful scenery but nope..just a bunch of buildings that could be mistaken for any European city. They are disappointed with their trip until they meet a spoiled British heiress that looks exactly like one of them. So she pretends to be her, they get whisked off to Monte Carlo and the film pretty much unfolds exactly how you would expect. There was a lot of potential to be "funny" - like how the 3 girls essentially don't get along but instead of witty bantering we get boring cattiness. There was a lot of potential to be "cute" - like how all three girls learn a life lesson but instead the only thing the 3 girls learn is that life is apparently better with a hot guy. The whole film was just bland, silly, uncomplicated and worst of all unmemorable with a severe lack of character development.

2. The doppelganger hijinks wasn't believable or watchable - I've never been a fan of the whole 'doppelganger' plot device but if done well (like The Vampire Diaries) it could end up being completely delicious. The biggest problem with this film is that Selena Gomez isn't a strong enough actress to pull it off. This is the first time I have seen her in anything and I am sad to say that I am not impressed - that isn't to say that she doesn't have potential. I would say that it was a problematic casting choice to begin with because as adorable as Selena is - she looks like she is 12. When she was trying to portray a British royal heiress - it just looked like she was playing 'dress up' with mom's clothing. Her accent was hard to listen to (the one that was supposed to be "real" was actually worse than when she was "pretending" the accent). I really want to like her, so I will give her another chance (see I am nice...sometimes...). Hopefully she will do something more suitable for her...

3. I would rather sit through 'Kraken: Tentacles of the Deep' - Don't get me wrong, Cory was probably the best part of the film - adorable Texas accent that wasn't cringe inducing (like Katie Cassidy's awful attempt), however he was severely underused - his storyline seemed out of sync with the rest of the film (and could have been easily cut out altogether). I am happy that he is expanding his career into films - and being in a Selena Gomez driven film seemed like a good idea in theory, but I think the film (and his part in it) was beneath his talent. I would also like to point out that every time he appeared on screen there was a wave of screams and claps from the audience which entertained me more than the film did. He clearly has a fan base - now he just needs a meaty role to showcase his talent.

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