Saturday, July 2, 2011

'Glee' - 50 Best Lines From Season 2

Spending my summer missing 'Glee' and re-watching season 2. Here are my favorite lines from the season: (p.s I posted season 1 lines a while ago - 35 of them....this time I could not narrow it down - 50 is the best I could do). (p.s.s I started in order...but that got too time consuming.)

1. When will you Glee Clubbers accept the fact that people hate you and think that you are nothing but a glorified karaoke club designed to make the inventors of auto-tune millions of dollars? - Jacob

2. Oh you don't speak English- You like me like me sing very much! - Rachel to Sunshine (who speaks English).

3. Mike tries to be into what I am into - like his abs. - Tina explaining why she dumped Artie for Mike

4. I don't know. I've never had any balls in my mouth- have you? - Sam responding to Puck's question of how many tennis balls he can fit in his mouth.

5. Stop the violence - Britney deadpan reaction to Santana & Quinn fighting in the hallway

6. How can you get caught between the moon and New York City? They are like 100 miles apart. - Finn

7. Can I just say that you are the hottest dentist that I have ever seen? No, like seriously you can totally drill me.... - Santana to Carl (before Emma cuts her off)

8. I'm more talented that all of you- I see that clearly now. It's Brittany. Bitch. - Brittany

9. I look forward to the day the paparazzi provokes me and I attack them. - Rachel

10. We need his voice! and his bad boy stage presence! - Finn's reaction to Puck being in juvie.

11. How can you do a duet by yourself? That's like vocal masturbation or something. - Santana

12. You can't tame the tiger. You've read my tattoos. - Rod Remmington

13. When you guys fooled around...did he ever just lie there? - Brittany to Tina (about Artie)

14. Hey, I'll bring him to work with me - weekends I volunteer at a stray cat rescue. It's at the bottom of a coal mine. - Kurt on taking care of the Warbler's mascot (a warbler)

15. I'm not know why? Because show choir is stupid - Lauren

16. I want Channing Tatum to stop being in stuff. Mike telling "santa" what he wants for Christmas.

17. You messed me up Rachel. - Finn (it literally breaks my heart the way he says it.)

18. I have no idea what is going on in this script...and it's not in that cool 'Inception' kinda way. - Finn about The Rocky Horror Picture Show.

19. Halloween is fast approaching. The day when parents encourage little boys to dress like little girls and little girls to dress like whores. - Sue

20. I don't need to hide behind my muscles like you do. - Finn to Sam

21. Awesome....I think. Are you insulting me? - Sam's response.

22. Give me some chocolate or I will cut you - Becky (dressed as Sue for Halloween).

23. Sorry, but I wanted to sing about Jesus - I'd go to church. The reason I don't go to church is because most churches don't think very much of gay people. Or women. Or science. - Kurt

24. I need to know that when I'm 25 and have won a bunch of Tony's and I'm ready to have intercourse and babies - that those babies will be raised a certain way. - Rachel to Finn

25. You are nothing but a scared little boy who just can't handle how extraordinarily ordinary you are. - Kurt to Karofsky.

26. At least I didn't fall and break my talent. - Rachel after she slips on a buttered floor.

27. I'm Mike Chang. - Brittany introducing herself to the new substitute.

28. What? I'm not going to kill you - Terri to Will

29. I was gonna suggest clapping erasers...but you guys are mostly dry erase....soooo.... - Holly Holiday's ideas for punishment.

30. Kurt, there is a moment when you say to yourself - "oh there you are, I've been waiting for you forever" - watching you do 'Black Bird' this week, that was that moment for me...about you. - Blaine (cue me hysterically crying).

31. Maybe you're right - maybe I am destined to play the title role in the Broadway musical version of 'Willow', but the only job you're going to have is working on a pole! - Rachel to Santana (oh snap!).

32. That's my man and his legs don't work. - Brittany

33. Can I be honest? Just with the hair...I think they do. Kurt to the Gap kid after the Gap kid says that no one at his work knows that he is gay.

34. Whatever, I'll just marry and NFL player. They're super reliable. - Santana

35. I don't want to die yet. At least not until 'One Tree Hill' gets cancelled. - Brittany (one of her best lines ever).

36. If I stay ...I am not singing no show tunes. That is the music of my oppressors - Azimio

37. You're so afraid of being called geeks or losers or gay that you settle for being nothing! Puck bringing the wisdom.

38. Newsflash Imelda: there is no one lining up to coach Glee clubs because it's a sucky job for losers. - Sue to Emma

39. Hold on...hold this song about your headband? Finn (about the most epic song ever performed on Glee).

40. I'm off to have craaazy sex...because I'm craaazy informed about it. - Holly Holiday

41. Sex. It's just like hugging - only wetter. - Holly Holiday

42. Wait. Cucumbers can give you AIDS? - Finn

43. And now performing the hit single Tik and also Tok by rapper Key-dollarsign-Ha, the New Directions. - Figgens.

44. Everybody drink responsibly. Brittany (after she barfs on stage from drinking too much).

45. I had to throw some of them out...I'm allergic to pansies and I don't mean that as a swipe at either of you. Sue to Finn & Kurt.

46. How do you manage to enter the building without setting off all the fire alarms? - Sue to a very flamboyant Sandy (AKA The Pink Dagger).

47. I don't even remember putting that in there. - Brittany after dirt comes flying out of her locker (put in there by Sue).

48. Maybe Rachel is fine with having an enormous beak....maybe she needs it to crack hard seeds. - Santana

49. Teen gay: you may now proceed to the next checkpoint without the fear of violence. - Santana to Kurt

50. Santana told me to never talk to you alone because you would try to steal all of my gold. - Sam to Rachel

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