Monday, November 15, 2010

11 Films to See This Holiday Season; 5 Films to Avoid

Holiday Movie season is upon us and I can't say that I am overly thrilled about any upcoming releases. I did find 11 films that peaked my interest slightly and of course, a few films that I will be avoiding at all costs...


1. Black Swan 12/3- I am not familiar with this story, but I saw the trailer the other day and all I can say to describe it is: WOW. It looks amazing. Darren Aronofsky really outdid himself this time. And Natalie Portman looks sensational. There is a lot of buzz about an award worthy performance and from the trailer alone I can see why. I know Natalie gets a lot of credit for being some outstanding performer - but I have yet to see her prove it (I have enjoyed several of her films - V For Vendetta, Closer & Garden State come to mind, but I can't say her performances were very memorable. I hate to admit it - but her most memorable performance to date is her digital short on SNL in which she raps - hysterical). I love, love, love Mila Kunis - she shows some serious acting chops in the trailer as well. Anyway, the film is about the life of a ballet dancer. The dancer lets ballet consume her entire life (like most people who are passionate about art). Not only is the film about this consumption, but also about letting your own internal demons get the best of you. The film looks raw, emotional and heartbreaking - not to mention creepy.

2. All Good Things 12/3 - I am a huge Ryan Gosling fan ever since his break-out performance in The Believer (an Oscar worthy performance). He can pretty much do no wrong in my book. The film is a thriller based on the true story of a man suspected of killing his wife (played by Kirsten Dunst - who inevitably will be the worst part of the film) and possibly others. Ryan can play a creep pretty well - so I am sure he will ace the part of suspected serial killer. The trailer boasts that the film is about money, power, secrets & lies (all the good stuff) - and it looks pretty intense. I am not sure how they could possibly create a film about an unsolved crime (do they presume that he did do it?).

3. I Love You Phillip Morris 12/3 - How many times has this film been slated to be released? I feel like I heard about this film at least 2 years ago but was constantly delayed or shelved for whatever reason (i.e too controversial). It is about 2 men who fall in love while they are in prison (the 2 men are Jim Carrey & Ewan McGregor). The trailer looks interesting - but I wouldn't say it looks that funny. It is supposed to be a comedy, right? I'm not really sure. It does look like it is taking the whole gay story seriously (it doesn't seem to be mocking them - at least in the trailer) - which if it is true, will be completely groundbreaking. Think about it: A main stream romantic comedy about 2 gay men starring well known actors. It could be one for the history books (film history that is..).

4. The Tempest 12/10 - I am a Shakespeare junkie. The Tempest is one of least favorite of his plays - but that won't stop me from seeing it. I am intrigued that the film is about Prospera (not Prospero) - changing the gender of the main character is a genius move, plus it is not often we see Shakespeare from a woman's perspective (Julie Taymore adapts and directs it).

5. Frankie & Alice 12/10 - Yes, on the surface it looks like another cliched stripper movie - and it could very well turn out that way. However, Halle Berry is getting rave reviews as a stripper with Multiple Personality Disorder. And we all know how much the Academy loves emotionally damaged strippers, prostitutes and drug addicts - so she will likely be nominated. I of course will be intrigued to see why.

6. Rabbit Hole 12/17 - I almost cried watching the trailer - I had no idea what the film was about before watching it so I felt a little blindsided. Losing a child must be the worst pain one can endure. I honestly can't think of anything worse. The film looks at this pain realistically - a couple trying to move past the pain and continue to live. Although it looks sad, it also looks like it has some lighter moments and hopeful ones. I also love Aaron Eckhart - but I am so used to him being a complete sarcastic a**hole - this role will be a nice change of pace for him.

7. Little Fockers 12/22 - I enjoyed Meet the Parents (not as much as other people did - but it was definitely amusing). However, the whole film was successful due to the fact that it showed Robert Deniro as a comedian - funnier than Ben Stiller (an actual comedian). Once the novelty of that wore off - it became less and less funny. Then came Meet the Fockers which was painful to watch. So, I clearly have no logical reason to look forward to this film - yet I do.

8. Biutiful 12/29 - My favorite director - Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu. I am in love with every one of his films, however all of his films were written by Guillermo Arriaga except this one. So, I am interested to see if he is as incredible without his writing partner (seriously guys...what happened!?). Arriaga's first solo project (The Burning Plain) was a complete disappointment - so I hope Inarritu doesn't fall to the same fate. Biutiful stars Javiar Bardem (good start) as a father of two kids who finds out he has terminal Cancer. It is obviously going to make me cry (as does all of his films). This is probably the film that I am most excited for and will likely not be released in my frustrating!

9. Blue Valentine 12/31 - Another Ryan Gosling film - this one slightly more well known due to its NC-17 rating that it received recently (basically a death sentence for a film). The film is a love story - but it is also supposed to be a gritty, realistic look at marriage between a young couple. Both Ryan and Michelle Williams are being hailed for their performances which is said to be partly improv, which makes things interesting.

10. The Green Hornet 1/14 - O.k - the guy who created such original masterpieces as The Science of Sleep, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and Be Kind Rewind made a superhero film? I am there. Seriously, Michele Gondry is a creative genius - so his take on the superhero genre is sure to be fantastic. Plus Seth Rogan as a The Green Hornet? How amazing is that going to be?

11. Kaboom 1/28 - If you don't know who Gregg Araki is then please go rent the heartbreaking film Mysterious Skin. I have no idea what Kaboom is about or who is in it - but I have to support this filmmaker for the rest of my life for creating a film that has effected my life the way Mysterious Skin did.


1. Harry Potter and The Deathly Hollows Pt 1 - So you all know who much I hate Harry Potter right? Serious loathing from my direction. I recently tried to give it another chance - I watched the first 3 films and I still stand by my opinion. The films are dreadful - Daniel Radcliffe is one of the worst young actors ever and the rest of the bunch are disappointing as well. The plot is not suspenseful in the least and the special effects are mind-blowingly awful. I will not torture myself by watching the rest of these films.

2. Burlesque - Christina Aguilera is not an actress. I can tell already by the trailer - she is not a triple threat. I am not sure why people assume because one can sing and dance - they can act as well. This film looks ridiculous and has Showgirls written all over it.

3. The Fighter - I feel like Mark Wahlberg already did this film - called Invincible. Sure it was about Football, but still it was about overcoming the odds in sports. If you just mix Invincible with any of the Rocky films - you have this film. There is literally no point in waisting time watching it - we all already know how it ends...right?

4. The Tourist - Two of the biggest stars in the world in the same film seems like it would be an automatic win. Right? Has everyone seen the trailer? Something went wrong...very, very wrong. The film looks like a complete mess and Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp somehow lack any chemistry. This film is sure to go down as one of the biggest bombs of the year.

5. Country Strong - Love Gwyneth (and can't wait for her appearance on Glee tomorrow). Hate country.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

3 Reasons "Red" Should Have Been a Better Film

I saw "Red" this week with high hopes for a great action comedy, instead it was cheesy and boring with little action or comedy. Here is why it should have been a better film.

1. The cast - I am not usually a big Bruce Willis fan, but I do enjoy him as an action star. I appreciated that he was still cast as an action star (albeit an aging one). The real attraction of the film for me was the 2 female stars - Helen Mirren & Mary Louise Parker. Helen Mirren as a gun toting assassin? Count me in! Come on...that is pure genius casting. I just wish she did a little bit more then carry a big gun. MLP didn't really get much to do except scream a lot and nag a lot (2 female traits that I loathe in films). One can never really go wrong with Morgan Freeman - but again, he wasn't given much to do but remind us of how old he is. It was disappointing that a cast like this wasn't utilized to their full potential. The only 2 people who made the film worth watching were John Malkovich (basically stole the spotlight through out the whole film) and Karl Urban (who is hardly a newcomer in the film industry - but I have honestly never noticed him until now) - he did a great job as the "bad guy/good guy".

2. The potential - The plot is actually sort of original (!!) - it's an action film with old people! Plus, it actually asks the question of what happens to all of these CIA heroes once they retire. How do they go on living a "normal" life after experiencing such an action packed life style. How did this film not kick ass? I guess my biggest complaint would be the writing (besides the creative plot, the dialogue was far from witty) and the directing (the action was almost non-existent, aside from one great fight scene - the rest of the action was just blowing up people).

3. The love story - Why on earth do we need a love story in the midst of an action film? I guess we needed a reason for Bruce's character to save MLP's character, but I think in general her character sucked. It would have been much better if she played a retired agent as well (not because she is old, but maybe she has some sort of injury or paperwork mishap that forces her into retirement? Maybe I should just re-write the film...). The other love story was between Mirren and Brian Cox which was to be a surprise but was extremely predicable and unnecessary.

4 Awful Films; 3 Mediocre Ones

Saying that I am disappointed in the films released this year would be an understatement. Last year at this time I already had 9 films on my "Best of List", this year I am struggling to find at least 5 - and the Holiday films don't look very exciting either. Recently I caught up on some films recently released to DVD and I would describe 4 of them as awful, while the other 3 are mediocre at best. Here are my thoughts:


1. Splice - **Spoiler Alert** The first thing that I wrote down in my notes as I was watching this film was "she is the mother"(referring to Sarah Polley's character). Guess what! Big shocker! She is the mother! So, my point is that the film is incredibly predictable and unoriginal. The creature is kind of a cool looking “hybrid”- but that is the only cool thing about the film. The plot is that they splice human genetics with animals (apparently several different animals - that is never really explained). Of course, things don't go as planned because as we have learned from every film - you can't mess with human nature. Science and technology = bad things happen. Wouldn't it be groundbreaking to have a film showing Science and technology saving humanity instead of ruining it? I have mostly Darwinist ideals about nature (you know evolution...survival of the fittest..), but I think science & technology are naturally a part of our evolution. They are only going to make us stronger. disturbing is it when he has sex with the creature?! Ew. As Sarah's character says "There are some things you DO NOT DO!". He not only had sex with an animal, it was also young (not sure of the age exactly but it was definitely an "innocent" creature) so he basically committed statutory rape and bestiality at the same time. What a way to give me nightmares. Just when I thought it couldn't get more disturbing - the creature turns into a male (and into a bird? Wouldn't they have noticed that with all of their testing? Are they the dumbest Scientists ever?) and RAPES her. Seriously, I am not making it up. At this point, I write in my notes "pregnant." Guess what? Big shocker! She gets pregnant! I am sure an equally awful sequel is already in the works. Adrien Brody & Sarah Polley are better than this film – being in such a poorly written film makes them actually bad actors. Bad career move.

2. Chloe - Predictable garbage – I cant believe these actors would stoop so low. How did they get Liam Neeson to agree to this film? Really, I want to know. I am indifferent about Amanda Seyfried. I think she is a decent actress (she holds her own against an extremely talented cast in Big Love and has comedic timing in Mean Girls & Jennifer's Body), but I hardly find her beautiful - besides the huge eyes - I would describe her as plain. The nudity was awkwardly placed and the lesbian storyline was ridiculous – it is a shame that Chloe is portrayed as a crazy, stalker with obvious sexual problems rather than a normal young girl who is questioning her sexuality. Also, I would have appreciated a little more background information on Chloe (she is a prostitute – although we get no background info as to why she is doing this as a profession – the only info we get is that she severely dislikes men and cries while she is in the middle of her "dates" so she obvi isn’t happy in her profession). The plot is that a woman suspects that her husband is cheating on her - so naturally she hires a prostitute to seduce him (which is the most passive aggressive way to confront your suspicions that I can think of). **Spoiler Alert** Is the audience really supposed to believe that Chloe is telling the truth? We never see Chloe and her husband together - we only see her lies about their sexual encounters. How disturbing is it when Chloe had sex with her son? It was an obvious plot point, but it still shocked me that they would actually go that low. Side note - the son was a super cutie (Max Thieriot).

3. MacGruber - There is absolutely no point to see this film other than getting to see Ryan Phillippe looking hot (especially in that white Henley - I adore guys in white). I am concerned that he would debase himself by agreeing to be humiliated in this film. Not funny in the slightest – I didn’t think it would be considering the SNL skits are rarely funny. I watched it with severely low expectations and was still shocked at how bad it was. There were a lot of low points in the film (that weren't funny at all) that I thought o.k it can not possibly get any worse - and then it continually shocks me by getting worse. Surprisingly, there was a plot - it just kept getting lost by unfunny (and often repetitive) jokes. I was embarrassed for all involved.

4. When in Rome - Preposterous. Absolutely ridiculous. The cast was awful. Dax Shepard was skeevy (and not hot), Josh Duhamel can’t act (o.k - slightly hot) and Jon Heder was just plain stupid (and ew.). They all played overly cliched romantic suitors in the most over-acted way possible. I’ve really tried to like Kristen Bell (I even tried to watch Veronica Mars once – but couldn’t get through 1 episode, I am planning to give it another try soon). She was pretty funny in Party Down but it was a pretty small dose of her (and the writing on that series is freakin' fantastic - it would make any actor look good). I just don’t think she can carry a film – especially a stupid, romantic comedy. The film wasn’t funny, charming, romantic or even the least bit interesting.


1. Iron Man 2 - I watched this about a month ago - and you know what is really sad? I can't remember a thing about it (I honestly can't say that I remember the 1st one too well either - what does this say about the Iron Man as a franchise?). I do remember that I was entertained for most of it - then it starts to drag at the end. It didn't move as fast as it should have. I love the chemistry between Gwyneth Paltrow and RDJ (I can't say the same about the chemistry between RDJ and Scarjo - but really does she have chemistry with anyone but herself?). The machines were awesome, but the fight at the end was tiresome. Sam Rockwell (AKA Owen Wilson's voice double) was a perfect as a slimy, bad guy.

2. Winter's Bone - This film hits a little too close to home for me (growing up very poor with a drug dealing father). We always had lots of dogs around that we couldn’t afford to feed. We did not however, kill and eat our own squirrels (and that was something I didn’t need to see. Thank you very much.). So that being said- I tend to hate these kind of films (white trash dramas) only because they remind me of things that I don’t want to be reminded of. Luckily, I didn’t have younger siblings to take care of - which is the only interesting part of this film for me. Jennifer Lawrence does do a decent job, there is a subtlety in her portrayal of anger and disappointment that is beautiful– I don’t see it as an Academy award worthy performance, but since she sadly has no real competition she will likely get a nomination - maybe even a win. I mostly see it as great writing – the way she is motherly towards her siblings yet cold at the same time. I just think the film's plot was a little tedious and predictable. It wasn't a bad film by any means, but I think the mostly positive reviews caused me to have higher expectations.

3. Get Him to the Greek - It was much funnier than I expected. The casting of this film is what made it watchable. Although, I think Russel Brand is slightly annoying (and looking at him makes me want to shower…he is just so …skeevy. ) - the rest of the cast was hilarious. Puff Daddy (he will always be Puff Daddy to me - get over it.) absolutely killed it - in a good way. He delivered my favorite line from the film ("Do you know how many Air Jordans 6 Black kids wear?") Hilarious. Jonah Hill and Peggy Olsen from Mad Men actually make a cute couple. I credit the casting director for not giving him the Seth Rogen treatment (i.e having a girlfriend that is too hot for him). I love Carla Gallo – from Undeclared (and as a running joke among the Apatow crew to cast her as “the girl” – I.e “Period Blood Girl” in Superbad, “Toe Sucking Girl” in 40 Year old Virgin. She actually has a name in this film which is definitely disappointing…did “microphone vagina girl” get rejected?) Rose Byrne was unexpected casting as Jackie Q - a ridiculous pop star. She was awesome - I guess I never thought of her as a comedic actress. I love the beginning of the film – the making of his video "African Baby". The lyrics are pure genius. As the film progresses it just goes from hilarious to strange and ridiculous. I think it all started when he had to smuggle heroin on to the plane. The plot just goes downhill from there and never recovers from it. What a shame....

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Thoughts On The Past 3 Episodes of "Glee"

I love writing about my favorite show - "Glee". Here are my thoughts on the past 3 episodes...

1. Duets -

The obvious homoeroticism. So – Kurt digs the new guy, which worries Finn because Kurt comes on a little strong (like stalker strong). The scene with Sam in the locker room in a towel – presumably nothing underneath - then slowly becoming less naked while Finn tries to talk him out of doing a duet with Kurt was supposed to be ironic right? The absurdity of the situation made me laugh out loud (it’s ok for Finn to watch Sam get dressed because Finn is straight, but for Sam to sing with a gay guy now that would be social suicide). If the intent was in fact irony, it is pure genius. I do appreciate that Finn still stuck up for what he said to Kurt last season (while acknowledging that he used a negative, hurtful word – he still rightfully felt uncomfortable with Kurt’s unwanted advances). I love that Burt Hummel is always the voice of reason and I am glad they circled back to what occurred last season. Now we can move on.

The obvious bi-curiousness. No, I am not referring to the scissoring that was apparently done by Brittany and Santana off-screen. I am talking about the fact that Brittany (poor naive Brittany) actually seems to have feelings for Santana – as can be seen by her choice for a duet song Melissa Etheridge’s "Come to my Window"….hilarious. She genuinely seems jealous that Santana would choose Mercedes to sing a duet with – or maybe I am reading more in to their BFF relationship than is intended. I’m not saying that Brittany is a lesbian but I think that her sexuality is a definitely a grey area – which is another genius move by the Glee creators.

The highlights. Lots of little stuff - Finn's response to Puck being in Juvie ("We need his voice. And his bad boy stage presence"). I love Mike Chang!!! He actually had a scene with lines and everything. And a song! (which ultimately was a mistake – he can not sing…). Santana calling Mercedes “Wheesy”. The gangs love for Breadstix – an Olive Garden type restaurant, which ultimately is pretty sad but a reminder of how they live in “middle America” where the Olive Garden is seen as a fancy restaurant (I apologize if I seem like a snob – but the Olive Garden is fake Italian food with an over-abundance of cheese added to every dish – if this is your idea of Italian food then you need to get outside of the bubble you live in). Santana using the term “vocal masturbation”.

The Lowlights. The songs (all BORING! – For real – "Don’t Go Breaking my Heart"?? The only song that was enjoyable was the Mercedes/Santana duet and that is only because of Santana’s ass shaking…and the way Mike and Sam check her out – but that was quickly ruined by Mr. Shue’s pervy laugh). Finn and Rachel need to be a little less attached at the hip (although I loved their fist bump! Super adorable). Artie & Brittany – I am not a fan of that relationship. I actually don’t like Artie (and I love that I don’t like him – they definitely don’t cater to the fact that he is in a wheelchair therefore we should all feel bad for him) – he is usually an ass (although...boy can move – one of my top 10 favorite Glee performances is "The Safety Dance"). Why should Brittany treat him any different than the other boy toys she’s used just because he is disabled?

2. Rocky Horror Glee Show

The theme. I am not the biggest Rocky Horror fan – but I was excited to see this episode. I even brushed up on my Rocky knowledge by watching it conveniently on my Netflix instant a few weeks before – just to ensure that I was prepared. While I understand the negative reactions to the episode – I for one highly enjoyed it. I think the series has a nice balance of “small” episodes like Duets and huge theme episodes like this one. If you ignore the fact that it’s sort of a “throw away” episode (i.e it doesn’t push the plot forward at all) and just watch it for what it is – an amazingly entertaining hour of t.v, I guarantee you will end up smiling more than once during the hour. I think the episode’s biggest flaw is that it didn’t make the story accessible to it’s audience – to assume that everyone has seen this film that was released in the 70’s, considering that most of Glee’s audience wasn’t even born then is just plain ignorant. I think it would have served the episode better to give some sort of background to the film – a few sentences explaining the plot- otherwise a great deal of the audience is left just as confused as Finn (not in that cool Inception kind of way…).

The objectification of men. Finally!!! It is actually an interesting and completely realistic topic for Glee to handle. From the beginning of the episode we see Finn getting a tad uncomfortable (i.e jealous- which I totally predicted from the Audition episode) when Sam is picked to play Rocky (which in case you didn’t know – is supposed to be a perfect “creature” hand made by Dr. Frankenfurter). Sam seems perfectly comfortable gloating that it will be “ab-ulous”. Of course, as the episode progresses we see that he isn’t as confident as he pretends and instead he is rather obsessive about his looks – in order to get his “perfect” body he barely eats anything and has a ridiculous exercise regimen that makes me feel sad for him (and anyone that does this to themselves). I am sort of wishing for this to progress into something bigger (like an episode where they confront him about his obvious Body Dismorphic Disorder). Meanwhile Finn isn’t exactly happy with his body but learns the all important message that “being confident is sexy”. The obvious upside to this episode is that we get to see some hot guys with barely any clothing, the downside is that it is sort of ridiculous to have someone as hot as Cory Monteith described as having a “hot mess” under his shirt. And comparing him to the “Pillsbury dough boy” – he clearly has defined abs he is just a larger guy in general (which not to be crude – in theory would describe …other areas…ahem.). I don’t think having two equally hot guys feeling down about their bodies sends the right message to guys – but hey that message is shoved in my face consistently (as proven by Rachel when she says her body isn’t like Santana or Brittany – um because it’s better? I don’t get it – all three of them have pretty much the same body type…skinny) – so, I guess it kind of kicks ass to have this negative message sent to the other gender. On a side-note – what happened to Finn’s “tighty whitey’s”? Total false advertising.

The highlights. The music. I never really got in to the music of the original film before but suddenly found myself switching between “Toucha Toucha Touch Me” and “The Time Warp” for a whole week (seriously annoying). I even bought "The Time Warp" on itunes - which is the first time I have purchased a Glee cast song. I think this episode features Cory’s best singing yet (his dancing…still needs some work but is totally endearing). Plus, I usually am not a Quinn fan (her voice is the weakest of the group) but she did quite a good job and I actually think she would have made a better Janet than Rachel did. Can Uncle Jesse become a series regular? Loove him...and love how Santana is mentally undressing him in every scene. Becky’s Halloween costume was genius as was her actually becoming a mini Sue. She had my favorite quote of the episode - “Give me some chocolate or I will cut you”.

The low lights. Last season I completely rooted for Will and Emma (although I do love his wife…), but Will has been completely annoying and absurd this season – Emma can do better (and yes, Uncle Jesse is soooo much better). And what was with Rachel’s facial expressions – the cross eyed awkwardness? I don’t remember Susan Surandon doing that in Rocky Horror. As much as I enjoy Mercedes and her amazing voice it would have been groundbreaking(for this type of series) to have a guy play Frankenfurter (as intended) – but I can imagine the backlash that would have followed. Puck would have been perfect. I didn’t miss him in the last episode – but I totally felt his absence in this one – especially with all of the shirtless action.

3. Never Been Kissed –

Kurt. Oh Kurt, how do you continuously embody the most heartbreaking, irresistible, sarcastically witty and endearing character on television? You’re facial expressions alone can reduce me to tears within seconds. This episode we get to see Kurt finally succumbing to the bullying he endures on a daily basis. It is obviously a “timely” plot line but it also felt relevant to the story of Glee. From the very first episode we see Kurt getting thrown in a dumpster. It was inevitable that all of the hate would start to get to him. I love that they show the reality of most high school faculty reactions to bullying (which is the clear problem in our society). Described by the new kid, Blaine, as the “Hey, if you’re gay – your life is just going to be miserable – nothing we can do about it attitude”. We, as a society, are sympathetic but do we have zero tolerance? No. Unfortunately we don’t - something we all need to contemplate. I also am delighted that Kurt “refuses to be the victim”. Instead, he chooses to fight back instead of transferring to another school (like Blaine did – he let the bullies win and regrets it). I have to ask – did anyone not see that kiss coming? I think it was pretty predictable that Karovsky is a self-hating, closeted gay. However, I am excited to see how they handle that in future episodes.

Puck & Artie. I am loving their new bromance! Although I find Artie incredibly irritating and Puck was a little over the top with his attitude this episode – I think in the future they will bring out the best in each other. Pucks outburst about how no one cares about him was surprisingly moving and true – did any of his Glee-mates go visit him? (And on another note has Finn fully forgiven him for sleeping with Quinn? They kind of dropped that whole story all together. I would appreciate some closure). The only problem I had with this plot was the idea that treating a girl badly will make her like you. That isn’t exactly a great message to send to high school boys.

The highlights. I like that this episode was very plot heavy (something that has been missing this season), yet I only have 2 highlights…Finn (although severely underused and getting way too skinny!!) still made me smile the most with his conversation with Sam in the beginning. How did we find the only 2 girls in high school that won’t put out? And I love that they brought back him thinking about almost killing the mail man – I die every time. (p.s – who had tubs in high school? I honestly have never heard of such a thing). The second is Sue’s confetti canyons and her describing Sam as a “Macaulay Culkin stunt double.”

The lowlights. Oh there are sooo many (overall, this is one of my least favorite episodes). First of all – the disappearance of Rachel (both in weight and plot). Dear Lea Michele – you are absolutely beautiful. Don’t succumb to the pressures of Hollywood! Please stop losing weight – you’re face is sinking it and it is aging you. Anyway, where is Rachel? She hasn’t had a major plot line this whole season. Her character is fantastic and hilarious…I miss her! Also, I think there is a huge missed opportunity with her dads and Kurt. Kurt is not the only gay in the village (Little Britain reference. Anyone?) – I know Rachels dads are obvi older, but likely wiser. I am sure they would have good advice for our dear Kurt. Second, the music was booooring. I enjoyed Puck and Artie singing One Love. And how Puck bullied people in to giving them money, but it is not a performance that I will remember. The girl mash-up was awkward and they were not very good at pulling off being bad ass rocker chicks. The boys mash-up was better…but nothing spectacular (I loved last years boys vs. girls mash-ups…). I didn’t mind the all boys school's rendition of Teenage Dream - I really liked that they did an A Capella version, however the song is dreadful. The biggest disappointment of all was the whole Coach Beiste story line. Dumbest plot ever…and why would Will tell her what was going on after he specifically said “Coach Beiste can never know about this”? Just plain ridiculous.