Monday, August 15, 2011

4 Reasons I Didn't Want See 'Glee: The 3D Concert Movie'

So 'Glee: The 3D Concert Movie' bombed at the box office this weekend. While the expectations were never really that high - I think at the very least the producers expected to get their money back from opening weekend (which they will eventually). I really don't think anyone doubted that it would crack the 'top 10' (it came in at 11). The funny thing is - I am a huge fan of 'Glee' yet I wasn't all that excited about the film. So if I (someone who can practically recite every episode) don't want to see it, then who does? Here are some reasons why I wasn't excited (and yes, I did actually go see it out of obligation as a fan of the thoughts on the film are also below):

1. I've already seen it - As most fans of the show have - either in concert or via the endless video clips on the Internet. I didn't go to the concert. The sole reason for this was that as much as I would love to see Lea Michele sing 'Don't Rain on My Parade' live, I simply can't handle the hoards of screaming teenagers. Luckily for me, the wonders of the Internet allow me to watch it anyway.

2. It panders to teens - Remember when Glee first aired - it focused on Mr. Shue taking over the Glee club?? He was a huge presence on the show, as were the other teachers. The show, although partly about a group of kids, was an ADULT show. Obviously, plenty of teens watched it and enjoyed it - but it bothers me that they are also controlling it. When the first episode of season 2 aired - the character, Jacob, very memorably "reported" on the Glee clubs "gay summer" and said to Mr. Shue "Did you know there is a forum on my blog begging you to stop rapping" and he responds "wait, kids don't like it when I rap?" and Jacob shakes his head no. Then, guess what happened?? - a whole season went by without any of Mr. Shue's awesome rapping!! When did the creators start caring about what the "kids" liked? This film is aimed towards "kids" in the same vein as the Justin Beiber and Hannah Montana concert films and it makes me feel old! Stop it Glee!

3. The actors stay "in character" - Honestly, this is probably the biggest reason that I didn't want to see it. When I read that this film would be a faux-documentary style about the McKinley Glee club making a 3D concert film - I was dumbfounded. That doesn't even make sense - why on earth would they be making a film let alone be performing a sold-out concert at a huge venue? I want to see behind the scenes footage of what it takes to put this tour on. Forget that, I want the world to see how much work these actors have committed themselves to because I adore every single one of them. I want to see them interact with each other and their fans. This is a film that I would be excited about. The "in character" thing is bullshit and to make matters worse, my favorite "character", Finn, isn't even in the film aside from the performances (because the actor, Cory Monteith, was recovering from food poisoning the day it was filmed). That totally blows.

4. 3D - Like I have said before, 3D films give me a headache - it's usually not worth the trouble for me (and I have spoken to many others who feel the same way). The film should have been released in good ole 2D so that it was more viewer friendly.

Overall, I think the film is borderline mediocre - I have more bad than good things to say about it. I wouldn't recommend it to anyone even 'Glee' fans.

Here are my highlights of the film -

1. Most of the performances - I would say that about 85% of the performances were awesome. Lea Michele's performance was stunning (of course she was brilliant in 'Don't Rain on My Parade' but she also shined along side Chris Colfer in their duet 'Happy Days are Here Again/Get Happy'). It made me crave for the future when she is back on Broadway. Harry Shum Jr's dancing was a big stand-out (as always). The most surprising highlight for me was The Warblers. I was so over them on Glee but they sounded fantastic (along with Darren Criss). I was very impressed. They "owned" that stage more than The New Directions did....

2. The Mini-Warbler - Seriously, who found that kid? He is freaking adorable.

and some lowlights -

1. The 3 fan "stories" - To be blunt - I could give a fuck about these people. I have a lot of harsh words for this whole premise but I don't want to seem hateful. So the nicest thing that I could possibly say is that the stories are too contrived and I agree with Entertainment Weekly that it felt very "self-congratulatory" on behalf of the creators of Glee. I think they need to stop trying to change the world and go back to being a funny, bitterly sarcastic show with awesome white guy raps.

2. Cory - It breaks my heart to say anything bad about someone so I won't. Ok...maybe just one thing - as I said above, I am under the impression that he was sick while this was filming so kudos to him for even getting on a stage and performing in front of a camera and thousands of people. However, 'Jessie's Girl' was probably the worst performance of the show. He did sound fantastic in all of the group numbers (especially 'Somebody to Love' which they shoved in after the credits so most people already left the theater). And I really wish they focused more on him during "Born This Way" and "River Deep, Mountain High" because in the Internet clips I have seen he is really funny in them (which is what the film needed some more of). Ok....I am done. That hurt my insides.

3. The fans - After watching so many Internet videos of the concert, I did regret not actually going. But then I saw this film and thanked the skies above. Fans are crazy!! I admit that as a teen I went to numerous *NSYNC concerts - and even had second row seats but us *NSYNC fans weren't nearly as crazy as fans nowadays. Or Maybe they were and I just was too enchanted by Justin Timberlake to notice. However, I have never been the type of fan that wants autographs or anything - I would never wait in one of those meet and greet lines because I have nothing to say. I also would never reach my hand up and want a performer to touch me in the middle of a concert - do you know how sweaty they are under all those lights dancing around?? EW. Do not touch me with those sweaty hands. Plus the performers should probably think twice about reaching their hands out - I watched a video of some lady pulling Darren off the stage (which was hilarious and scary at the same time). Also, the fans were distracting once the 3D camera panned out the audience members were in focus and it was really annoying. My friend who came with me also mentioned how annoying the camera angles were. It didn't bother me that much until I winced when I thought we were going to see directly up Naya Rivera's short mini-dress number she wore during 'River Deep, Mountain High'.

4. The "in character" concept - So I already stated my dislike for the concept - but the actual "in character" moments were really annoying. The biggest problem is that these actors are not great improv actors and I am pretty sure they didn't get lines to memorize - so the whole thing fell really flat. None of them seemed "in character" at all. How great would it have been to have Mark Salling teach us how to disc golf (which is what he did during downtime) or have the audience join Cory and Naya interacting with fans at one of their AT&T meet and greets? That is what real fans want to see!! I'm calling for a re-do of the whole film.

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