Monday, May 9, 2016

Thoughts on 5 Films

1. Steve Jobs - First, this is one of the most boring movies I've sat through in a long time. Second, Steve Jobs is a gigantic asshole and I don't understand why there are so many movies made about him. Being an asshole does not make you interesting. This movie spent its entire plot basically trying to justify Jobs as an asshole. He treats his ex like a piece of garbage, he treats his daughter like she doesn't exist, he treats his employees like they are expendable, and he treats the consumers that buy his products like they are idiots. I wouldn't be surprised if "they won't know what they are looking at, they'll just know that they want it" is an actual quote from him. How can anyone feel good about buying Apple products knowing how much they belittle their consumers? I'll never understand it. I usually love Aaron Sorkin projects, but I think the subject is so off-putting, I couldn't even appreciate the dialogue. I recently became a fan of the show Halt and Catch Fire - same subject; different people, and I think they do it in a much better way. I understand the characters and their motivation, even though I don't get all of the tech talk. The only slightly interesting part of this movie was his interactions with his daughter, but it became very repetitive.

2. The Hateful Eight - Wow. I haven't disliked a Quentin Tarantino movie this much since...never. This is actually the first of his movies that I haven't, at the very least, found moments of brilliance. It has an extremely unnecessary running time of 3 hours and 7 minutes. Let me repeat: 3 HOURS AND 7 MINUTES. And it was awful. The dialogue is cheesy and awkward. It almost felt like it was just a read-through and not the actual filmed version, because the actors were just spewing lines with no feeling or direction. The costume and set-design were overly done. And the first hour was so boring that I lost the plot completely, and there was no way in Hell I was going to rewind it to figure it out. Instead I just stared blankly at the screen and hoped the plot would reveal itself once again. It did, and it was so dumb and predictable. If they didn't advertise a certain actor as part of the cast (*spoiler* if you haven't seen any ads for it - Channing Tatum), then maybe I would have been surprised by the turn of events; instead I was waiting for it. Like, for fuck sake when is he going to show up and save her, how much longer do I have to suffer? The showdown was, in fact, spectacular, and oh so Tarantino, but the amount of pain I had to endure with the rest of the movie just wasn't worth it. If you are interested in a modern Western from 2015, watch Bone Tomahawk. Trust me.

3. Concussion -  Unfortunately, the third boring movie in a row that I watched. And it is actually laughable that people used this as an example of the Oscars being racist. NOTHING about this movie deserved ANY awards recognition. I know it's based on a true story, but it's unbelievably stupid. I mean, did (do) people really believe that a sport in which one is being constantly tackled *wouldn't* suffer from brain damage? It really took people 100 years and one determined doctor to figure that out? (side note - I have no idea how long American football has been around, but that's my probably inaccurate guess). And then he states "God does not want us to play football.....common sense"....um, yeah, it is. And yet, this ONE guy discovered it. Like, how fucking stupid are we as a human race? Football is all about making money, so it doesn't surprise me that the people in charge don't give a shit ($ > human life. If you don't believe that, then can I please join you in your world? Pretty please?), but it surprises me that people think that they are owed any kind of extra monetary compensation because they are brain damaged. It is beyond comprehension. If you chose the profession, in which you are already highly paid, it comes with the territory, in my opinion. It's just like a boxer suing/blaming the boxing federation (is that a thing? Again, I'm just guessing. Sports are not my thing) for injuries due to getting punched in the face. Anyway, aside from this being a dumb story about dumb humans, I just couldn't find anything to connect with. Will Smith's accent sounded way too forced, and his "angry" scenes were hard to watch. And I love Will Smith. I just can't get behind this performance, or this movie.

4. I Smile Back - I like a lot of things about this movie. First, the cast is great. Sarah Silverman is a big part of what I liked. It's brilliant to use someone who is normally thought of as funny, to highlight depression. I also really like her as a person. She's unique, bold, witty, and unapologetic about who she is. I also adore Josh Charles (*spoiler* but really who would ever cheat on Josh Charles?! He's like the perfect man. So adorable.). Second, I love the reference to "smiling" as a form of combating depression. The title is never really referenced, but I think it's meant to highlight how most people suffering from true depression, don't mope around and let it be known. Instead they get through their day by "smiling back". It reminds me of my favorite quote from Melancholia, "I smile, and I smile, and I smile". Third, I loved the way it ended so ambiguously (*slightly spoilery*), do we think that was her "rock bottom" and she will finally get real help, or do we think she jumps off of a bridge? Because I sort of think it's the latter (but I'm a realist, and let's be real, depression and alcoholism often ends with suicide). Fourth, the marriage and kids "ideal" is a tired one. I wish they explored this more as the cause of her depression. I mean, I know she loves her kids, but I think someone who suffers like this isn't made for this type of life. It's hard to resist it, though. It's weird that there has been so much talk about the "depressed" wife/mother, and yet it is still something to aspire to. The thing that ruins the movie for me, is that she has "daddy issues". Not only is it such a cliche, it is such a disservice to the illness of depression by giving her a "reason" to be depressed. It's annoying, because this movie does so much so well, and then everything is just completely ruined by this one plot device.


5. The Lobster - THIS MOVIE IS FUCKING BRILLIANT. That's all I really want to say, because if you know anything about it, I don't think it will have the same impact. So, now I will just list the moments of pure genius: (if you haven't seen it, please, I beg you, stop reading).
1. His reason for choosing a lobster
2. The dangers of being single (men will choke, women will get raped)
3. "If you have any arguments or problems that you can't solve yourself, then you will be assigned children. That usually helps." (I almost choked on my shock/laughter)
4. "I don't miss companionship at all"
5. The love story - the loners falling in love is actually perfect because it's something that happens naturally instead of forced due to "compatibility".

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