1. In the Heights - I'm a big fan of musicals, but I'm just really, really,
really not a fan of Lin-Manuel Miranda. His style is just not for me, and I could tell that from seeing ads of
Hamilton on Broadway. It was such a gigantic hit, but I absolutely dreaded ever watching it. I did watch the filmed version that's on Disney +, and I was a little disappointed at how right I was. My expectations for this were considerably lower, but the trailer looked like so much fun - so full of life and color, I did have hope (as negative as I am sometimes, I would always prefer to be surprised by something). Just like
Hamilton, there are some things I really like about this movie - so I'll start there: (1) Both of the main actresses are wonderful - Leslie Grace and Melissa Barrera have amazing screen presence, beautiful voices, and show a range of emotions. Actually, even the supporting actresses are great - I just wish they had more to do. I would have loved to see more of Stephanie Beatriz and Dascha Polanco. And the most resonating scene is definitely the one with Olga Merediz. (2) The scene on the side of the building with the George Washington Bridge in the background is so stunning. I
wish the rest of the movie was like this - the creativity of this combined with its simplicity is just so beautiful. I could have watched it for hours on end. But that's where it ends. I just really can't get behind anything else - the music is ok. Some of the songs are catchy, but are often ruined by the rapping (seriously, the rapping causes my whole body to convulse. It's so bad, you guys. Just *CRINGE*). It all starts to sound the same by the end. And other than the previously mentioned side of the building scene, all of the other performance numbers felt so overdone - the scene in the beauty shop with the wigs moving is so creepy, as is the public pool scene (there are SO MANY people in that pool. Just...ewwww). The story line isn't exactly original, and some of the scenes are just so cheesy - like her picking up the spray painted rags and having a fashion 'epiphany', as if tie-dye and paint splattered clothes haven't been a thing since the 70s (LOL). But to end this on a positive note - it's a cute message of appreciating where you come from, the people around you, and being proud of who you are and what you've accomplished. It's frustrating to see the negative reaction to the box office numbers - it didn't hit projections, but I feel like the expectations of those projections were extremely high to begin with. Those numbers were setting it up to fail and will now be used as justification against diverse projects like this. Just watch.
I didn't mind the first one. Not that I really remember much about it (I *think* it's the one with the really cool under the bed scene? Or is that
Insidious?). But I recently watched the second one, and I thought it was so dull. And there is no way in Hell I'm watching the
Annabelle movies (it's a fucking doll. That's not scary. At all). I do love both Vera Farmiga and Patrick Wilson so, so much, though. This one is much better than the second one, but I got really bored about 45 minutes in - it all is just so obvious and it feels really repetitive. I don't believe any of the "true" stories for one second, so I think that hinders my enjoyment of these types of movies anyway. I also recently read in a very brief article that Ed Warren was allegedly abusive towards his wife, Lorraine in real life, which makes these movies depicting them as happily married really fucked up. I haven't looked completely into the allegations yet, but it's on my list of things to look into (like, I wonder if he blames it on some "supernatural" shit?). I did like the appearance of John Noble, in a very John Noble role, saying very John Noble things ("
I have chicken shit on my hands!" HAHA, oh...John Noble. Just perfect).
3. Things Heard & Seen - This is a weird movie - it's like
What Lies Beneath, but not nearly as good (I LOVED that movie). I just think it's weird because there are so many things that just don't really make sense - and I guess we're just supposed to go with it. Like how she just opens the door for two teenage boys when she's home by herself. And how she just moved into this new home that her husband picked up without googling anything about it (and when he said "my wife doesn't know", does he just assume that she will never look into it? or ever talk to local people? It doesn't make sense). And she didn't find it a huge red flag at how quickly her husband gets angry? He was so upset about their very young daughter wanting to sleep in their bed that he sleeps in a different room. And...the thing that upset me the most is how dirty the fucking sink is. It's an old house, I get it, but seriously, that grosses me out so much. Anyway, it's all just so obvious, but there is something incredibly watchable about it. I was engrossed through the whole thing, but I just think it would have been better as a straight-forward domestic abuse/murder mystery rather than adding in the whole haunted house bit. Also, in
What Lies Beneath it's a huge surprise that her husband is a monster (sorry if that's a spoiler...it's a 20 year old movie, though, so I'm not really
that sorry). But in this, it's quite clear that he's awful because...um...he just looks like an asshole. I'm not really sure I'd ever be convinced that guy could play anything else (that's not a compliment to that actor). The obvious highlight is Rhea Seehorn.
4. Chaos Walking - It's crazy to me that Tom Holland is going to be in two of the worst movies of 2021, but here we are. This was obviously going to be a mess - it was supposed to be released years ago but had a terrible audience testing and went into reshoots bringing its budget to over 100M, and released to a critical beating and a BO return of 22M (I know, I know, obviously there is a pandemic, but still that's a rough loss). Holland is definitely not the problem, here. He's so freaking adorable it hurts. And Mads Mikkelson in that fur coat? *chef's kiss*. Plus, I appreciate the ideas because they are super out there and totally weird, and...not really filmable??? So, visually it doesn't work at all. I also don't think Daisy Ridley is a good enough actress to carry half of a movie. She's fine in the
Star Wars movies, because those movies are so much bigger than her. But, she's not a good actress. I don't understand why she got to keep her accent and Holland didn't? And why is her hair blonde? It's very obviously dyed blonde and not natural...so, did she dye it in space? And are we supposed to be intimidated by a Jonas brother??? They couldn't get someone...like, actually tough looking? I think my biggest problem, though, is the dialogue because it should be waaaaaaaaay funnier to hear the thoughts in a young guy's head (and like, waaaaay dirtier). Instead he's just like "oh she's pretty". Um...ok. How
very boring.
5. Pinocchio (2019) - I was curious about this movie since it was virtually unheard of until it was nominated for a few Oscars (for Makeup and Costume Design). It's super weird that it's referred to as
(2019) even though it was released in 2020, and it's also super weird that there is also another one coming out that is
(2021) even though it probably won't be released until 2022 (what a shit-show). I was super annoyed that Amazon Prime has this listed as the "English subtitled version", but it was actually dubbed in English. I absolutely LOATHE dubbing, but I already decided that this is what I was watching in that moment and it took so much energy making that decision I couldn't bare the thought of picking out something else to watch (I know you've all been there. All 3 of you!). Anyway,
Pinocchio is probably one of my least favorite Disney classics. I don't really remember much about it - except for Figaro, of course, who doesn't exist in this version. I did not like this version, at all. It's really long and boring. Pinocchio is super fucking creepy, too. I don't see anything particularly celebratory about the costumes, either - it's all very bland. And just all around creepy.
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