Thoughts on 5 Films

1. Stars at Noon - Well, Taron really dodged a bullet here didn't he? For those who don't know the backstory - Taron Egerton was supposed to star in this after Robert Pattinson dropped out due to Covid scheduling issues, and then Taron dropped out due to personal issues (his mom had Cancer). Obviously, I would have preferred Taron had no personal issues and continued in this role, but this ended up being very bad. I rated it two stars, but one of those stars is simply because I like both actors and they deserve better. Honestly, when I heard Taron took the role, I was skeptical about it (I've only seen one Claire Denis movie, High Life, and it was awful); it didn't seem the right role at the right time for him (yes, I have his entire career trajectory planned out in my head - and yes, the Netflix movie he is filming right now is the right move to get his name more recognizable). It was sort of ironic that Joe Alwyn took over the role because Taron has talked about not getting the lead role in Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk (another bullet dodged), and it really upset him (the role went to Alwyn). I really like Alwyn - he has a really strong screen presence, and he gives these really interesting, quiet, introspective performances. You can tell that there is a lot of emotion and thought in his eyes. I also really like Margaret Qualley. And like I said, they deserve better. There are so many choices in this movie that irked me beyond repair. Like the overwhelming elevator music when our two leads meet?? WHY? It's annoying. Also, both characters are very unlikeable and annoying - and I'm not even sure if that's supposed to be done on purpose? I feel like the audience is supposed to root for them? But nothing about their interactions feel genuine or authentic at all. I just don't buy any of it - the characters, the romance, the plot - none of it. Her hair is fabulous, though. And I love that they kept it very big and frizzy because that is, in fact, what her hair would look like in that humidity (probably the only thing that felt authentic in the whole movie). I do appreciate the sex scenes - I know more and more films are shying away from these steamy, but unnecessary sex scenes, but Denis seems to have no problem keeping it all in. I do wish that the leads had more chemistry (but again, I can't tell if this was done on purpose), because it makes even the steamiest scenes fall really flat. At least with High Life, there are a few stunning shots (actually there is one that I think about regularly), but this is ultimately very boring. There are so many unnecessary moments dragged out for seemingly no reason at all. And it's weird that there is all of this political commentary in the backdrop, which I'm not familiar with (political strife in Nicaragua), but this movie is definitely not helpful at understanding any of it. A little background would have helped immensely. I'm a little annoyed that I paid to rent this - I'm very good at waiting it out, until it's released onto one of the streaming services I already pay for, but I was really curious about this so I became impatient - and it definitely wasn't worth it. 

2. Beast - This was way better than I expected. Not necessarily a great movie, and probably not something that I will remember years from now - but it was very tense and entertaining, with some strong performances. It's kind of like The Grey, more action-packed, but the allegory is still there - with battling a "beast" as a way of seeking redemption for not being a good husband or father. Idris Elba is very good, as expected, but the actresses who play his daughters really stood out for me. I'm really against any kind of zoos or even those open zoo things that call themselves "safaris" (there is one in NJ that is part of Great Adventure I think, but obviously it's not an actual safari - it's in NJ for fuck sake!), but I would LOVE to go on an actual safari adventure and see animals in their natural wild habitat. But I am also convinced that lions would love me - like they would sense my aura and know that I'm not a threat (I *know* that's not how it works, but...still...maybe??). The movie gets a little boring and repetitive, because obviously they are not going to kill off the kids, but I was still entertained for its entirety. I also laughed hysterically when he punches the lion (somehow so much funnier than when Neeson punches a wolf). I also like the little Jurassic Park references (the daughter's t-shirt and the ending is definitely a reference - expected, but brilliant!). 

3. Rosaline - This is super cute! I would have been obsessed with this if it came out during my teenage years. I'm a bit of a Shakespeare junkie now, but I was a huge Shakespeare nerd as a teen. And I LOVED (and still love) movies that adapt Shakespeare for a modern world - like 10 Things I Hate About You (which is The Taming of the Shrew) and speaking of that movie, someone on Letterboxd pointed out that Kyle Allen (who stars as Romeo) looks like Heath Ledger and HOW HAVE I NOT NOTICED THAT BEFORE?!! He's such a cutie! But the resemblance is uncanny. Anyway, this doesn't do the modern story thing, but instead focuses on a side character - which has been done before, probably most famously with Rosencrantz And Guildenstern are Dead. Rosaline is Juliet's bff in Romeo & Juliet, but believes the greatest romance in history, should have been her story. They modernize the language and change the plot in really fun ways (especially the tragic end - probably would have made this "cute" story less "cute" if they both commit suicide LOL), and I dug it all. I've said this before, but it stands even more so now, Kaitlyn Dever is A STAR. Ditto for Isabela Merced. The cast work together really well in this. The whole thing is just very likeable. 

4. Blackout - I really like Josh Duhamel and Abbie Cornish, but obviously this got some terrible reviews. It even has a 1.7 star rating on Letterboxd (a site in which users regularly hand out 5 star reviews to movies they simply "like"). So, I knew going in that this was bottom of the barrel type stuff. And yet I still pressed play because I was in the mood for a quick trashy action thriller before going to bed and this fit the bill. Both Duhamel and Cornish should have much bigger careers. They definitely carry the movie because literally everything else about it is God-awful. The supporting actors, including Nick Nolte, are terrible. The story just...starts, with no real set-up, plot or character introductions - and then never addresses any of these essential elements for a movie. I think it's trying to be a bit like The Raid, especially with some of that wild camera work, but it just fails miserably. The worst part, though, is that they have Abbie in this white button down shirt that clearly doesn't fit her - and it's not even in a sexy too tight sort of way. It's just ill-fitting and unflattering (and anyone in costuming or wardrobing knows not to put a button down on a woman with larger breasts unless it's specifically designed for larger breasts...it's styling 101). Anyway, I did laugh hysterically at one part - when Nolte is flabbergasted that nobody noticed Duhamel who he describes as a "6 foot 3 Ken Doll". 

5. Raymond & Ray - Mildly interesting, but never really goes to the depths that it could - and instead opts for a more "ew" factor than an emotional one. But before I get into that, let's talk about Ewan McGregor and Ethan Hawke for a second. It's genius to cast them as brothers because for some really weird reason, I get them confused all the time. More so when I was a teenager in the 90s and they were becoming very popular then. It's such an odd phenomenon because they look nothing alike, and certainly don't talk alike (one is from Scotland and one is from Texas!), but I'm seemingly not the only one who thinks this. The story is about these two estranged brothers who have to bury their also estranged father - but, it's such a weird story, because can't they just...not do it? Like, if their dad was actually that bad, and they have no connection to him, then who cares what happens to him after he dies? Why do people have this weird obligation to do things for people simply because you share DNA? But I get the impact of having closure and finding forgiveness, etc., but the story just moves so slowly. However, back to the "ew" part - *spoiler ahead* one of the brothers has sex with his dad's girlfriend??? WHY? There are millions of women in the world to have sex with. It's so gross and it makes me physically ill to think about - so I'm just going to erase it from my memory. I truly worry for Apple film content (their tv and miniseries are superb, though), 90% of their films have been mediocre at best.