Thoughts on 5 Films

1. Pet Sematary - Even though I had a habit of calling my cat "Church - the Pet Sematary cat" (full quote) when she would get real bitchy - she would just suddenly turn pure evil and it was the first cat that I had that would change her personality so dramatically within seconds (her real name was Trouble and I miss her dearly), I don't really have much recollection of the original movie (nor have I read the novel). The story is just too dumb for it to actually be scary. There are a few creepy moments that are done well, but it's not a movie that would keep me up at night. The cast did what they could - especially the little girl. And I did like the ending - I don't remember if the original ended that way, but I really appreciated that it didn't have a typical "final girl" type of ending. Other than that, I can't say that I will remember anything about it in a few months time.

2. The Seagull - I was actually really surprised by the dismal reception to this movie - it's based on the classic Checkov play, starring Annette Benning and Saoirse Ronan! How can that be anything less than amazing? Well, surprise! It kind of sucks. There's just something really lacking - the only one who seems to be giving it her all is Benning. Everyone else is just walking and talking through the motions, without any actual emotion. I forgot about how ridiculous (and hilarious) the character of Irina is, but Benning is just perfect in the role. Corey Stoll was really miscast though. I mean, just zero chemistry with the rest of the cast. Also, I didn't really find anything visually stimulating about it the film, either. It's very cut and dry. I would love to see a more modernized film version of this play (something in the style of 10 Things I Hate About You).

3. If Beale Street Could Talk - Realizing now that I'm not really a fan of any movies in this post. I hate when that happens, because I would so much rather write about good movies than bad ones. Not that this movie is bad. Far from it. I just didn't really connect to it. I did really like most of the cast. Stephan James is excellent (and he's great on the show Homecoming), plus the supporting cast of Regina King, Brian Tyree Henry, Finn Wittrock, and very brief appearances by Diego Luna and Pedro Pascal (he isn't even credited...isn't that weird?). But, the main girl is really, really dull. There is something just really off about the performance - she is supposed to be reserved, but it doesn't feel genuine at all. I could see someone like Aja Naomi King really ace this part. And I think if I liked the main actress more, I would have had a stronger connection with the movie. There are some really beautiful scenes and the music is stunning. But, again, it's not something I will remember in a few months time. There is one scene, though, that is wonderful - the pregnancy announcement with both families - just really strong performances and some shocking dialogue.

4. Mile 22 - So. much. gunfire. I watched this a few weeks ago and I can't even tell you what it's about, I just remember constant gunfire. I also remember falling asleep for 10 minutes and waking up to...yup...you guessed it, more gunfire. I admit, I only watched if because of Marky Mark (I will watch anything with Marky Mark), but was pleasantly surprised by Lauren Cohan. She was always the best part of The Walking Dead and I'm so glad that she escaped from that garbage of a show (that I still watch because I am a masochist, apparently). I wish she chose a better project to showcase how awesome she is. Also, I just looked up her name (my brain just isn't working right) only to discover that apparently their is a sequel being made to this movie. But....why? Did it do well at the box office? Because I don't remember anyone talking about it.

5. Her Smell - I saw this movie on a few "Best of 2019" lists, which is the only reason I forced myself to watch it. And all I have to say is...what in the actual fuck? How can anyone find anything other than mediocrity within this movie. And, Elizabeth Moss is fucking terrible. Like, cringe-worthy terrible. I know I might be biased because I've never liked her, but I did just recently give her positive criticism for her work in Us. So, I'm not always stuck in my ways. I do recognize when an actor surprises me. I actually LOVE when it happens (like with Adam Driver in the Star Wars movie. I don't remember which one...they are all blending together at this point). Also, this character is awful. It reminded me of Courtney Love (and I fucking loathe Courtney Love). You're not meant to root for her, so ultimately this is just an exercise in narcissism and selfishness. And then to top it off, we have to sit through an entire rendition of Moss singing "Heaven". THE ENTIRE SONG. A few lines would have sufficed, but nope, prepare to be tortured. It's also way to long at 134 minutes (which for some reason my brain registered as being an hour and a half. When I realized my error, I was super pissed). There is no way this story needs to be over 2 hours long. There is one highlight in the movie and that is the love of my life, Amber Heard. Looking stunning with the Cleopatra-esque hair and makeup. Also, on a random side-note: Is this how Ashley Benson and Cara Delevingne met? I don't really follow celebrity gossip (anymore), but that picture of them carrying the sex swing into their house made me die laughing. I love celebrities who just live their lives and don't give a fuck.