Thoughts on 5 Films

1. Conclave - I get why people are putting this in their Top 10 of the year lists. It's extremely well-made. Edward Berger definitely deserves a directing nomination for this. He knows how to make a visually interesting film, as seen with his All Quiet on the Western Front remake. There are shots that are simply stunning. The character blocking is incredible- which is not something I normally critique, but I did study film a long time ago, so stuff like this stands out to me, especially when it's done so well and with so much thought. I think my disappointment is with the actual story - I've seen The Two Popes and I've watched that tv series with Jude Law (The New Pope? The Hot Pope? I don't remember what it was called), so I feel like I've had my fill of pope stories for a while, if I'm honest. This whole thing is just a chore to sit through, as I could care less about the pope. Let's not pretend the whole entire system isn't corrupt. But, I do appreciate that the incredibly boring plot, plays out like a thriller - keeping it suspenseful and intense. I think the ending is really, really, really dumb, but I also appreciate the relevancy of the modern twist - which is what the papacy struggles with (modernity). Like I said, it's all very well-made, so I understand the love for it, but it's just not my cup of tea. I'll go along with Fiennes for the Oscar though because anyone is better than the other expected nominees. 

2. Maria - I kind of expected to not really like this because I didn't love Jackie (I did like Spencer, and I loved Ema and El Conde). The thing is, though, I don't really know much about Maria Callas, I didn't even know about the relationship with Aristotle Onassis (Jackie's husband). And, guess what? After watching this movie, I still don't feel like I know anything about her. She was an opera singer who had a public relationship with a married man? So what? She also seems like a narcissistic bitch, with the way she treats the people around her. I was waiting the whole time for this film to give me a reason for it to exist, and it never does. And, after looking at pictures of her, I don't think Angelia Jolie has even a tiny bit of resemblance to her. I don't have a better actress in mind, but there has to be someone who is of closer resemblance (I actually think Natalie Portman looks more like her than Jolie, but that would be weird to cast her as both Jackie Kennedy and Maria Callas. OR would that have been genius?? Hmmm...??). Jolie just has such strong, recognizable features and she's one of the most beautiful women in the world - a biopic is just automatically a bad casting move. But, she's probably going to get an Oscar nomination (and maybe even the win? Demi Moore should have that in the bag, but I guess we'll see how it all plays out soon). I just found this movie terribly boring. It was hard to stop myself from falling asleep. I actually was falling asleep but then the lantern scene in the rain happened and I woke up - some stunning imagery. But then it was over, and I started to doze off again. The ending with the dog crying over her dead body is so sad, though. It got me. 

3. Joker: Folie a Deux - I don't know why there was so much visceral hate towards this? It's...fine. I rated the first Joker 3 stars, and I've given this the same. I think the first one was elevated by Joaquin's phenomenal performance (he deserved that Oscar, but only because the best performance from 2019 wasn't nominated. *cough* Taron *cough cough*), but it was mostly a love letter to 70s films like Taxi Driver, The King of Comedy, etc. And this is the same - only the love letter is to Old Hollywood musicals, referencing Fred Astaire, and famous Hollywood couples, like Sonny & Cher. After watching, I actually agree with Todd Phillips that this is not a musical. It's a Drama with musical interludes. I appreciate that it's an unexpected turn for a Joker story. I enjoyed the concept, the dream-like sequences, and Lady Gaga's voice in some of the songs sounds angelic. Joaquin gives just as much to this performance as he does in the first. I think Hollywood is giving up on his antics (being difficult to work with, dropping out of projects last-minute, etc.), so he needs to shape up because he's one of the strongest actors currently working. I liked Lady Gaga in A Star is Born, but she can NOT act, and we need to stop pretending that she can. I think her casting only works to counter-balance the fact that Phoenix can't sing (like at all - his voice is far too gravelly and weak). But it also has very little substance or focus and almost feels like a waste of time. 

4. Fly Me to the Moon - This is a cute movie. It's not something I'll remember in a year or two, but I was entertained for the most part. I don't know HOW we haven't had a Scarlett Johansson/Channing Tatum led film before because they are absolutely PERFECT together. They need to do a rom-com STAT. It's got some great dialogue, really funny one-liners, Scarlett's dry sarcasm, and it's fast-paced. But it also should have been 90 minutes. I think I actually would have rated it a whole star higher if it had been edited down. Also, my husband, who is a big NASA space nerd, is very upset that this movie exists because it's going to amplify the conspiracy theorists "they faked the moon landing" nutjobs again. He came home from work while I was watching it and was legitimately mad that I was watching it (and enjoying it! LOL). There's literally a line that says "no-one will trust the legitimacy of NASA again" and he was like "SEEEEE!!". WHATEVER, HUBBY, it's just a movie, get over it! I will say that as much as I love the match-up between Tatum and Johansson, I do think that he feels a bit out of place in this world. And that haircut is FUNNY on him. He looks like a football player dressed up as a nerd for Halloween. That's all I really have to say about the movie, which is why I think it's going in the forgettable category. 

5. Red One - I thought FOR SURE that this was the worst movie I would see in 2024. I'm shocked that I just watched something worse (Dear Santa - 2024 Christmas movies can't catch a break!). But this is pretty bad. Like, one star bad. I hadn't seen much about it - just that it bombed at the box office and cost a lot of money to make. I just knew it was a Christmas movie with Chris Evans and The Rock, but as soon as the talking CGI polar bear appeared, I thought "oh no, I might not be able to watch this. It may actually be unwatchable". I've never been the biggest fan of Chris Evans - and I know that's a minority opinion. I just think he's boring. Very hot. But boring. The only film that I actually liked him in was that rom-com with Anna Faris (I think it was called What's Your Number?" or was that a different Faris movie?). I don't think he's a good actor - he just lucked out with the Captain America role. And people can argue all they want about his dramatic roles being good (I see a lot of love for his performance in Defending Jacob), but I think he's especially bad when he leans into his natural Boston accent. It's just too much. As far as The Rock, I think he's been good in family friendly adventures (like the Jumanji remake), but lately he's been taking himself too seriously. He got burned by the Black Adam debacle and he's making us all suffer for it. Plus a movie that cost a reported $250 million should look FAR better than this. The CGI is terrible. It's all very ugly. The whole military vibe version of Santa is very jarring too - like, why would kids want that version of Santa? He's supposed to be jolly! I will say that the one star is only because of Kiernan Shipka. She's a lot of fun as the villain. Imagine being a petite 25 year old girl and getting a role that requires you to fight The Rock and make it believable? LOL. She's great, though. It's like she actually gets the spirit of the movie and rides along with it, while the rest of the cast is fighting against it.