Thoughts on 5 Films

1. No Sudden Move - I've always been up and down with Soderbergh, but I always go in with high expectations. And my expectations for this, in particular, were really, really high. I'm so here for Julia Fox (incredible debut performance in Uncut Gems) and Kieran Culkin, along with Soderbergh favorites, Don Cheadle and Benicio Del Toro. Plus, nobody does a heist movie like Soderbergh - they are usually just so effortless. But this felt like work. It drags, there's just no energy, and I lost track of who was screwing over who. I can blame most of this on the dialogue - it's just so dull (definitely no memorable moments like "Does he make you laugh?", "He doesn't make me cry.", which is still among my favorite movie dialogues of all-time). Also, Fox and Culkin are not in it very much, so obviously that's disappointing for me. I've seen a lot of people saying really positive things about this movie, but I just didn't connect to it at all. I did enjoy when a certain someone shows up (which, if you love movies and Soderbergh, you can totally guess who I'm referring to). Ultimately, I will forget it exists in a few months and it's definitely towards the bottom of my Soderbergh ranking (I don't actually have a ranking, but I would put it on the same level as Haywire). 

2. Fear Street Part 1: 1994 - I've never read the books, and I've never really been an R.L. Stine fan. The Goosebumps series was super popular when I was a kid, but I remember reading one of them, and I thought it was dull (but I don't remember which one it was). I was also more into things like Tales From the Crypt because I thought it was cooler (more adult-like). Anyway, I'm not really a fan of this movie. I'm super confused at the target audience because it feels really immature (and exactly what I think of when I think of R.L. Stine books), but then there are these super gruesome kills and it's rated R. It starts off great, with a very cool homage to Scream - Maya Hawke is perfectly cast in this role, too. I was so excited to see her, but then I realized quickly she was the Drew Barrymore of the film. Still, excellent, though. But then, the whole thing takes a huge nosedive. It's boring, the main girl can not act (and what is up with her voice? She sounds like she is trying to sound younger than she is?), the whole supernatural stuff is so dumb, and there's just nothing fun about it. The only sort of good thing is the much talked about needle drops of the most perfectly picked 90s songs (NIN's "Closer, "Sweet Jane" by The Cowboy Junkies - just absolutely perfect songs). I also think that the trailer for Part 2 looked excellent (my thoughts will be in the next post, but I was wrong...). 

3. Barb & Star Go to Vista Del Mar - I was tricked into having high expectations for this - so many people I trust with movies just gushed about this. It's...cute? Certainly not anything to rave about. It reminded me of an extremely long SNL sketch (and that is definitely an insult nowadays. But, again, that's something I consistently get tricked into watching snippets of, because on Sunday morning so many people will talk about a particular sketch and say "I know SNL isn't funny anymore, but this is" and guess what? It's never funny. Like that Titanic iceberg sketch?! Eeeek...that's supposed to be funny? And that guy is nominated for an Emmy? What is happening?!). There are definitely parts of this that I adore - Jamie Dornan, in particular. I absolutely love when an actor does something unexpected - and this is something I never expected him to, not only participate in, but he just devours every scene he's in. It's wonderful. His song is really catchy too (I've had it stuck in my head for days - *sings dramatically* "am I in Heaven or am I in Hell"). And he's so fucking hot, and this somehow makes him even hotter. I'm also a big fan of Kristen Wiig, but again, in this, it feels like she's doing one of her SNL characters instead of acting. It's also just...dumb that these women are supposed to be in their 40s? They act and dress older than my mom (who is late 50s), so the whole vibe of it just doesn't make any sense. Also, don't get me started on Florida - I'm convinced it is the worst place on Earth. There are parts that made me laugh - like the shark poster with all the blood and the rave version of "My Heart Will Go On" (I actually remember that being played in clubs in like 1999/2000 LOL). Anyway, like I said, it's cute but it is waaaaaay over-hyped. It's not something I would ever watch again. 

4. Shiva Baby - I don't say this a lot, but the score totally makes this movie. The screechy violin noise makes if feel like a really intense horror movie. You can just feel her anxiety that builds within this claustrophobic story. And for such an uninteresting plot, it's just a really well made film with excellent acting performances. It's unnerving, uncomfortable, and also really amusing. I'm impressed that this is a directorial debut from someone who is only 25 years old because it feels so self-assured and confident in its choices. Rachel Sennott is great, but she reminds me of someone in real life who I hate (I only hate like 3 people, so you know she must be awful). Although, I don't think you're necessarily supposed to like her character, so the whole thing sort of works for me. The woman who plays her mom is so absolutely perfect (I'm sorry but I'm too lazy to look up her name). I was super surprised when Dianna Agron shows up - I was very harsh on her during her Glee days, but now I have such a soft-spot for all the Glee kids. She's really good in this, but it's really disturbing when the one girl describes her as having "the essence I want in 15 years", which made me realize that Dianna is now 35 years old. Time is such a fucked up thing, ya know? 

5. False Positive - Could be the worst movie I've seen in the last decade? The last 15 minutes are so outrageously bad and in such poor taste that it physically makes me sick to think about. I watched this for Justin Theroux and Gretchen Mol (love them!), but I am honestly horrified by how bad this is. Where should I start? *spoilers* I guess, first, I've had many, many people tell me to watch Broad City (it's towards the top of My List!), but Llana Glazer is so terrible in this that it's really not selling me on watching anything else that she's involved in (even worse, she is a co-writer of this atrocity). Second, absolutely nothing happens for the first 40 minutes - and then suddenly - she's suspicious of her doctor and her husband? Why? And then - all of the sudden - she imagines they are making out? HUH? Third, why is it called False Positive when she is really pregnant? I thought that maybe that was the twist? But instead the twist is very obvious and not as outrageous as I was expecting. Fourth, why is the Head Nurse also the Receptionist? And how did Mol say the line "I trained myself to not have a gag reflex" without laughing? Finally, as I said, the ending is just atrocious and features one of the worst images I've ever seen. And anyone who has suffered a miscarriage/stillbirth/neonatal death, etc. should NOT watch this movie. I'm just so offended and I don't get offended very easily (I mean, maybe I do with certain things, but I try not to let it cloud my judgement of things, but this is offensive on every level).