Thoughts on 5 Films

1. You Were Never Really Here - Why has it taken Lynne Ramsay 7 years to make her next film? We Need to Talk about Kevin is one of those movies that really stuck with me. I don't think I was too impressed with it when I originally saw it, but ultimately its unsettling images are unforgettable. I feel like that is the most important aspect of creating films/telling stories - making something memorable. I felt underwhelmed by You Were Never Really Here, but I have a strong inkling that I will be praising it as "unforgettable" 7 years from now, so I guess I would call that a success. I don't really have any fair negative criticism of the film - there are some stunning shots, Joaquin Phoenix continues to be one of the strongest working actor of his generation, and the story turns in unexpected ways. I just didn't really connect with it, or care about what was happening in any way. It's certainly not the "Taxi Driver for the new century" as it is touted as (I mean, come on, seriously?!?). I think it will still land in my Top 10 for this year (it's at #7 currently), but I don't know how I will feel about it a month from now...or 7 years from now.

2. A Wrinkle in Time - Nope, never read the book and I heard absolutely awful things about the movie but I was still intrigued. I wouldn't say it's absolutely awful...but it's pretty close. I can't even imagine kids enjoying it because it's sooooo boring. It isn't even pretty to look at because it's so over-saturated with color that it almost looks like an animated film (a poorly animated film at that). And are we supposed to be impressed with Oprah's bedazzled eyebrows that is literally stick-on jewels adhered to her forehead that a child could do? The costume and makeup design is just really next-level terrible. It was really hard to pay attention to (it's a kids movie, obviously she's going to find her dad - so what's the point?), and the dialogue was too sugary sweet for my taste. If this were an original idea, I might give it some extra consideration for imagination, but to adapt this story into something so dull is just unacceptable. The acting is also pretty terrible all around.

3. The Beguiled - I've written about Sofia Coppola before - I want to like her, but unfortunately I never end up liking her films (Marie Antoinette is the exception and I didn't hate The Virgin Suicides. Every other one of her films I've hated - yup, including Lost in Translation). I didn't exactly hate this movie, but I don't really understand the point of remaking this story. It's not a good story, or relevant in any way. It's a very inherently anti-feminist story. It's a story about women and girls who suddenly find their lives interesting because a man has entered their living space. He pretty much becomes the center of their world - opening themselves up to jealousy, narcissism, and manipulation (and they suddenly care about their appearance?). It's all just so offensive. Also ***spoiler*** are we supposed to feel satisfied because they unnecessarily kill him? There are seven of them against a man who just had his leg cut off - uhhhh, they should be able to subdue him without killing him. It could have been interesting if they updated it to actually make it a feminist story, but as it is, it's just so dated. The cast is exceptional, though. And Colin Farrell is the perfect charming soldier - I'm glad he got to keep his accent.

4. Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom - Aw man, this was just terrible. I wasn't expecting it to be good. None of the Jurassic sequels were any good. But I liked that Jurassic World rebooted the series and brought it back to life in such a fun way. As soon as I read the plot for this movie, I knew it was ridiculous (They are saving dinosaurs from an erupting volcano? Really? A volcano? Okay...), but I still had hope that it was going to be fun. Especially because they heavily advertised Jeff Goldblum's involvement. He's literally in it for maybe 3 minutes total, so that's their first and biggest mistake. The second mistake is keeping Bryce Dallas Howard as the main star. I can't stand her (as an actress. As a person, I'm sure she's delightful just like her dad). She was the worst part of the first one, and of course, continues the streak with this one. Also, did I mention that the plot is RIDICULOUS. I mean, they outrun a volcano! I'm not even sure how they think bringing them to a different island that would have zero human involvement would exactly save them? An island would have limited resources and the dinosaurs would run out of food and die anyway. But whatever. Then the "bad guys" bring some of the dinosaurs to this mansion to sell them (seems smart), and then of course they escape and wreak havoc (and stomp on the roof that somehow doesn't collapse - what they hell kind of glass roof would hold a freakin' dinosaur??). The only good thing about the movie was the (several) times the T-Rex saves the day. I think it's hilarious that they keep that going in every movie. Right place, right time Mr. T-Rex. The ending was pretty interesting though, with the whole actual, literal "Jurassic World".

5. Terminal - I heard nothing about this movie when it was released (was it even released??). I almost forgot about it! I really wanted to see it because it seemed like a really atmospheric noir film with Margot Robbie (sold!). I wish I could say that I loved it, but unfortunately it is kind of a disaster. There's actually some really great stuff mixed in, but overall it is just a big mess. The biggest "what the fuck" is Mike Myers' involvement. He's dressed up in this weird makeup - as if he's doing a character from one of the Austin Powers movies. Are we not supposed to recognize that it's him? Are we not supposed to guess that eventually it will be revealed that he doesn't look like that? Then they set up "it's only a movie" by talking about how movies don't have to make sense (?), which I guess explains why most of the movie takes place in a 50s style middle America type diner but everyone has British accents. Where does the movie take place? When does it take place? None of it makes sense, but it seems like the creators wanted it that way. It definitely pulls inspiration from Blade Runner and Pulp Fiction but not in a good way. Then, the ending - oh, man, the ending. The last 15 minutes are pure garbage. There are multiple "twists", all of them are stupid. Robbie does her best. I can see why she took the role - if the movie worked it would have been a great platform for her.