Thoughts on 5 Films

1. The Founder - Not a bad movie, but a very forgettable movie. It's just a very straightforward biopic about the "founder" of McDonald's. It's an interesting story of passion and ultimately betrayal (LOL it totally sounds like I'm describing a romance), but I didn't really invest much in any of the characters. I love the resurgence of Michael Keaton. He's a wonderfully nuanced actor, and he does a great job here. I actually remember as a little kid, my grandmother used to drive by this gigantic mansion (the biggest that I've ever seen in person) in Southern California and she used to tell me that it belonged to the founder of McD's (I think it was maybe his wife's, though? Ray Croc would have been dead at this time). My grandmother also used to bring me to McD's as a treat and I used to cry - I hate hamburgers. They smell amazing, but every time I take a bite it makes me nauseous. I do love their fries though. I rarely get fast food, but when I do - it's McDonald's french fries and a chocolate shake. Anyway, I don't have much to say about the movie, and that's never a good sign.

2. The Love Witch - Such a weird little movie. Purposefully made to look like a 60s/70s exploitation film, it's fascinating from beginning to end. It works for two reasons: The main star, Samantha Robinson is captivating, and it's directed by a woman, Ann Biller. The first is essential for a movie like this. Robinson portrays Elaine with a sense of wonder, a little innocence mixed with insanity. But the audience empathizes with her, and wants to see her happy. Oddly, she reminded me of Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany's (which is a compliment of the highest order). The second is also essential, in that it feels like an exploitation film, but it's actually not - our star is never exploited; instead she is empowered. And while, I don't necessary think gender matters when directing stories, most male directors fail to get this balance right. They also fail at small details that only women get (I highly doubt a male director would put the tampon scene in, and I also think it's genius to show her putting in her hair extensions because women's hair does not naturally look like that!). All in all, it's a really fun movie. Odd and beautiful. Completely mesmerizing.

3. Paterson - I was honestly really disappointed with this movie. It's extremely boring; which can be said about several Jarmusch films, but I can usually find connections with the deeply personal stories and explorations of human nature. Plus, I love stories where a person is intrinsically linked to his/her town. However, I didn't connect with this at all. The movie is about Paterson, a bus driver from Paterson, who writes poetry, which is a nod to the famous epic poem "Paterson". That's as interesting as it gets. First and foremost, let's talk about Paterson, NJ because I don't really think this film represents what the city is like today. I, myself, can't speak for Paterson because I DON'T GO THERE. It's not a great area at all. In fact, it's one of those areas that if you accidentally find yourself in, you lock your doors and don't make eye contact with anyone. I've only been there purposely a few times a few years ago to help build a house for Habitat for Humanity, and the organization was very specific to tell us NOT to leave the area. But while, I can't speak too much for it, my BF owns a business in Paterson and he has nightmare stories of drug addicts, dealers, dudes walking around with machetes (for real.). None of this is shown in the movie, instead it feels like a quaint, quirky little NJ town, one where a 10 year old white girl is just hanging out by herself (it just wouldn't happen). Also, speaking of race, there are way too many white people featured. Paterson is less than 10% white. It's largely hispanic, with Spanish as the most commonly used language - so this film feels really inauthentic on every level. Plus, his bus is practically empty during every trip - finding an empty NJ transit bus is like finding a unicorn. Anyway, next subject. This guy is a dick. I appreciate that he's introverted, and that he doesn't talk much, but the way he treats his girlfriend is horrible. He doesn't share anything with her, and patronizes her art work as an act of whimsy. Also, his poetry sucks.

4. Song to Song - I honestly don't know why I bother. I haven't liked a Malick film since The Thin Red Line (actually, that might be the only Malick film that I like...). I can appreciate his passion for cinema as an art form, but I feel like his films have become very repetitive. They all feature the same fish-eye lens, the overbearing voice-over, the poetic but almost nonsensical dialogue, and it's all very boring. He sucks me in by having such an amazing cast - this one features Ryan Gosling, Michael Fassbender, Rooney Mara, Natalie Portman, and Cate Blanchett. I suddenly realized while watching this, that his recent films are all about the same boring, entitled, wealthy, beautiful, white people - and none of them feel like "real" people. There are just random shots of them dancing in front of a scenic background, or jumping on the bed, or like, doing nothing but contemplating their very boring lives. Real people don't have time for that shit. I don't even really know what this movie is about. It takes place in the Austin music scene, about some couples who cheat on each other and then date each other, and switch partners. I don't know. Just all bullshit, really. I read a review that called it "cinematic masturbation" and LOL because that is spot-on.

5. Baywatch - Revamping old television shows can be tricky, but if they can make 21 Jump Street work, then I fully believe it can be done with anything, really. I was looking forward to this movie simply for the nostalgia factor, but I admit, once the reviews came in, I decided to wait until home release - no sense wasting money on the theater for this one. I think it's weird that controversy about critics was created by The Rock because he blamed critics for the failure of the movie, but come on man, it's a shitty movie. It's really terrible. It deserved the critical beating, and critics shouldn't be blamed for its failure. The people who MADE THIS SHITTY MOVIE SHOULD BE BLAMED. It's common sense. There was nothing funny about it, it wasn't fun and campy like the original series, the plot was dumb and predictable. I don't like The Rock. He seems like a great guy (I like how he interacts with fans, and I always read about him donating his time to charities and such), but he's a terrible actor. He's alright in action movies because there isn't much acting involved, but he is not funny. Zac Efron is actually pretty funny and charming, but his personality was to be the asshole in this and it was painful to experience. I do really adore Alexandra Daddario - and she's probably the best part of this movie, along with Kelly Rohrbach. This is Kelly's first film role (known more for modeling), and she has "it" - that screen presence that you just can't look away from.