Thoughts on 5 Films

1. Ted 2- Really disappointing sequel. I thought the first one was pretty hilarious, at least for a movie about a talking bear. I expected it to be more of the same vulgar, politically incorrect humor, but instead it felt like the same jokes over and over again. I didn't laugh once in the first 40 minutes. The only part I enjoyed was the reprisal of Giovanni Ribisi's character. He was the funniest part of the first one, and they definitely acknowledge that in this one by recalling the hilarious "I Think We're Alone Now" scene (this time in a Ninja Turtle costume!). There are two other parts that I laughed at - when Ted can't help but sing "Sweet Caroline" (absolutely brilliant) and Amanda Seyfried (as Sam L Jackson) saying "I put a frown face on Facebook! How am I supposed to explain that?!" after she thought Wahlberg's character was dead. Seyfried is growing on me, but I did feel the absence of Mila Kunis (only because I love her). I think the story is obviously problematic; it was easy to forego a realistic story in the first one because it was told in a "fairy-tale" style, but this one is just ridiculous.

2. Burnt - I was expecting a pretty terrible movie, but I actually didn't think it was so bad. I really wanted to see it because I was a huge (and possibly the only) fan of Kitchen Confidential (I even own the first and only season). Bradley Cooper as a sexy chef is a dream come true (insert heart eyes emoji). Honestly, it was hard for me to be impartial, because he's just so perfect, so I'm not really sure if the movie was good or not, but it certainly wasn't terrible. My biggest problem with the movie is all of the food shots. Most images of food makes me sick, and I lose my appetite, and I cringe out of sheer disgust. In other words, I don't like knowing how my food is prepared, and I don't savor in the image of food sitting pretty on my plate. Also, do fancy chefs really cook stuff in plastic now? I don't understand how that is safe? Doesn't plastic release chemicals when it is burned? And why is so much food wasted just because it doesn't look or taste "perfect"? It's disgusting. Anyway, Cooper is perfection (obvi), Sienna Miller does a great job, as does the rest of the cast. And the betrayal at the end? WHOA. I didn't seen that coming at all, but it made perfect sense. It could have been a better movie, if it dug a little deeper into the obsessive nature of being "the best" at something, but it stayed pretty much at surface level.

3. Time out of Mind - The subject matter of this movie is extremely depressing, but it needs to be told. It's about a man struggling to come to terms with the fact that he's homeless. It's great insight into the many problems that cities have with dealing with the homeless population. When you're young (and/or naive) you may wonder why homeless people don't just go to a shelter, right? Well, as seen in this movie, it's a bit like sentencing oneself to prison. You lose your freedom, and in turn, your sense of self-worth. Then there's organizations like the Salvation Army that help homeless people after they admit that they need to be "saved" by God. It's all a bit depressing to think about. There are also mothers who refuse to get "help" in fear of being separated from their children (which if she is homeless might be the best thing, but it's a devastating decision still, no?). Anyway, I think this movie could have gone even further to show the problems with "the system" (after all, our main character is a white male - he is treated far better than minorities are). However, it's still a heartbreaking situation that highlights how easy it is to suddenly be homeless. The moment when he questions "am I homeless?" is just soul-crushing. Gere is at his best; straddling the line between naivety and an aging stubborn male. There is a scar on his head that is highlighted, but I believe, never directly referenced, indicating a possibility of a head injury. I sort of like not knowing his full-story because it emphasizes the humanity of the strangers we pass on a daily basis living on the street; doing their best to survive. We don't know their story, but assumptions are made, and this needs to change.

4. Sleeping with Other People - I thought this had a different (better) concept than the one we are given. I was under the impression it was about a couple (who are also best friends) who are in an open relationship. In theory, it is, it's just that the characters never really acknowledge that they are in a relationship. The are just presented as friends (without benefits) who discuss their relationships with other people to each other, even though they are clearly in love with one another. I think the worst part of the movie is the fact that it's written by a woman. Here are the 3 reasons why I assumed it was written by a man: 1. The first scene with Jason's character getting pushed into a moving taxi because he cheated (and bitches be crazy...). 2. The "I'm going to teach you how to masturbate" scene. Yes, there is actually a scene where a MAN teaches a WOMAN how to finger herself. 3. This same man claims that every woman he's had sex with (which we assume is a big number) has had an orgasm and it's never questioned. All 3 of these things usually come from a (delusional) male brain. BUT NOPE. Women can be just as fucking stupid. Anyway, there are some parts of the movie that I genuinely like (a lot). I do like their relationship; but I'm a crazy person who believes that friendship is the most important part of a relationship. Sudeikis and Alison Brie have great chemistry together (even though I think Sudeikis is fucking booooring. It's hilarious how he describes how boring the guys she's in love with is. It felt like he was talking about himself.). Plus, I laughed out loud a few times, especially at the end credits. Literal tears were streaming down my face from laughing so hard. Overall, the movie is very successful, I just can't understand how it came from a female brain.

5. Hitman: Agent 47 - So incredibly dull, generic and derivative. I'm not a huge fan of Rupert Friend, probably because I'm not a huge fan of Homeland (it's a good show, not great), I was interested in seeing him in something different, though. He didn't impress me; especially if you make the obvious comparison between this character and Jason Bourne. The movie is a bit like the Bourne movies in that it's about turning humans into weapons, but there's no style to the character. It's very one-note. Also, the supporting cast is rough. The girl from that terrible show, Betrayal, is the female star (the one that needs to be rescued several times, even though she is a trained weapon, as well. Makes sense.), and she is just as terrible here as she was on the show. And Zachary Quinto is NOT an action star. He was so awkward in those scenes - and obviously *spoiler* he is the bad guy because FUCKING DUH. The movie isn't necessarily bad; it doesn't even make it into my 2015 Worst List, but it's just sort of pointless. I won't remember a thing about it in 6 months. Guaranteed.