2 DVD's to Avoid Watching

1. Shutter Island - I have been waiting to see this film for what seems like years. I have been a fan of Scorsese/DiCaprio collaborations (especially The Departed), plus the trailer looked ridiculously amazing, plus it also stars Mark Ruffalo. But then the release date kept getting pushed back and the reviews were mostly harsh - when it was finally released I had practically lost interest. Now that it was finally released to DVD, I was able to watch it. Here are my thoughts:

1. I am so happy that I didn't see it in the theater - I might have been tempted to walk out.
2. The Sixth Sense twist. I knew that there was a huge "surprise" twist in the film, which is always distracting in my opinion. I spent the entire film creating all the different possibilities in my head. Spoiler Alert: I knew Teddy was Andrew - that part was obvious to me. But then if Teddy was Andrew - who the f was Chuck? I thought maybe he was a hallucination but then everyone else interacted with him so he must in fact exist. So that led me to believe that he must have been part of this "conspiracy" to get Teddy/Andrew to the island. I never in a million years thought Chuck was the missing doctor - or that the entire thing was a role play experiment. Because that is the most ridiculous plot imaginable. I guess if I were really bored I might watch the film again to understand it better - but watching it the first time was painful enough for now.
3. The supporting actresses, Michelle Williams and Emily Mortimer, both gave award worthy performances. Leo was great too, but that is expected.
4. DID - The only thing that the film had going for it was the social commentary on how mental patients were treated in the 1950's. Did they actually think that this "role play" experiment would treat someone with extreme Dissociative Identity Disorder? That is incredibly disturbing.

2. Valentine's Day - Oh the horror. This was a mess of a film (which is no surprise considering the reviews - Even Entertainment Weekly gave it an F!), but I thought for some reason it might be cute, considering all of the talent involved. But it was really just a bunch of celebrities thrown into a film with no humor, no romance and worst of all no point. Here is my take on the different stories:

1. Ashton Kutcher - I think of Ashton as the male Jennifer Aniston. He is not a movie star. He belongs on my television (he was amazing on That 70's Show), every film he has ever been in has been a disaster - except for Dude, Where's My Car - and that doesn't really count because it was like 10 years ago. His character in v-day is basically the ultimate romantic - he owns a flower shop and he thinks proposing on Valentine's Day is a good idea. He gets his heart broken by Jessica Alba and then realizes he was really in love with his BFF Jennifer Garner anyway - so no big deal.
2. Jennifer Garner - plays the woman scorned by her doctor boyfriend (Patrick Dempsey) who is actually a happily married man. She refuses to believe it until she sees it with her own eyes - which just makes her stupid.
3. Topher Grace & Anne Hathaway - Topher (another That 70's Show alum - but a much better movie star) and Anne actually make a really cute couple, but unfortunately Anne Hathaway plays a phone sex operator. This wouldn't be a problem if it weren't for her obnoxious accents and that she thinks it is ok to "work" at her real job.
4. Bradley Cooper & McSteamy - The only love story that was decent, but boring. And they only have one very tiny scene together. McSteamy is the ultimate man's man (a professional football player) who is in the closet and decides to come out of the closet (although it seems like ultimately he just likes the publicity).
5. The kids - Emma Roberts was super ridiculous announcing that she was planning on having sex with her boyfriend during lunch time. While the Taylor's were just plain ridiculous - please tell me teens aren't that stupid.
6. Jessica Biel - Not a fan of her or her character. She is throwing a "I hate Valentine's Day" party, which we all know is a "I really love Valentine's Day, but am alone and pathetic so I am pretending to hate it" party.
7. Julia Roberts & Queen Latifah - Didn't have much to do but fill the strong women quota.