Thoughts on 5 Films

1. Peninsula - Train to Busan is my favorite film of 2016 (and I can't believe that was 5 years ago, but I still feel like I *just* watched it). This is a huge disappointment. The actual title of the movie - Train to Busan Presents: Peninsula is a really weird flex. A movie can't "present" another movie. And it's clear that they realized they made a bad movie and that attaching it to its predecessor will still force people to watch it even after the bad reviews (i.e ME. I'm such a sucker). Where Train to Busan is concise and thrilling, this is dull, slow, and filled with pointless scenes. It moves more into The Walking Dead territory (a show that I hate, but yes, I'm still watching it) - by having the "humans are scarier than the zombies" trope - they've formed gangs and capture other humans for sport and entertainment. But it doesn't really have anything to say that hasn't already been said. And the CGI with the car scenes is overwhelmingly bad. It's just not engaging at all. The characters are really stereotyped and predictable too. It doesn't even feel like it's in the same universe as Train to Busan. 

2. Stardust - It's crazy that they couldn't get the rights to David Bowie's music and they still decided to go forward with this biopic. The film follows Bowie during his first (and mostly disastrous) trip to the United States. It's also "unauthorized" and highly criticized by Bowie's family (I always forget that Duncan Jones is Bowie's son, so it always feels like new information, and then I go..."no wait...I knew that already"). As awful as this film is - there are a few things that I appreciate. First, this is the type of biopic that I like - one that focuses on an important part of someone's life instead of trying to tell the "whole" story. And, since they couldn't get anyone "official" to help with the story - most of it is probably highly dramatized or completely imagined (I find this an interesting concept). Second, I had no idea who Johnny Flynn is and, at first, was really put off by his interpretation of Bowie. However, as the film goes on, he starts to win me over. I looked him up and was surprised to find out that he's the guy from Emma. - so it's clear that he has range. And I appreciate that he sang the songs himself (even though they aren't Bowie songs). Otherwise, though, this is a really bad movie. There's no passion, no heart, no imagination. It's the opposite of everything Bowie would have wanted. And just when I thought it couldn't get worse - it ended in that laughable freeze-frame. Wow. 

3. Zack Snyder's Justice League - Ok, so when this whole "Snyder cut" thing started to come around, I was really confused. I think I missed a step with what happened with the 2017 Justice League. I thought he left as director because of his very tragic family issue, but that the film was still very much "his". And I thought that's why it was so jumbled - because he couldn't let it go and there were "too many cooks in the kitchen" as they say. Plus, Snyder is always so criticized - I think I got swayed by all the hate he receives, so I automatically blamed him (and it's so ironic that Whedon was always someone I thought could do no wrong. I think it's time to admit I was definitely wrong on that one). But I also think Snyder gets a lot of hate because some of his fans are...a bit over-the-top. Anyway, I'm happy that they were successful in giving Zack the resources to release his version. But, I'm also disappointed in the result. While it was miles better than the first version, it's still just...an okay movie. It's more cohesive and the characters are given a little bit more to do, but I was still bored. And it's nice that Cyborg and The Flash are given a backstory and a purpose, but maybe they were originally cut because the acting is so questionable (partly because the dialogue is clunky, but also because they were both miscast)? I'm also stunned that people claim that the FOUR HOUR movie goes by quickly - do you not feel time??? Because I felt every single minute of it. I just kept thinking "when is it going to get good?" "I've already seen this before", "yes, it looks better, but it's still the same movie", "why am I watching this again?", "ok...how much more is left? 3 hours??? Fuck my life", etc. I made it to the 2 hour mark and decided to break it up into 2 parts so that I didn't hate myself as much. I think part of why I had such a hard time with it is because I rarely rewatch movies - it feels pointless and like a waste of time when there is SO MUCH NEW TO WATCH. For me to rewatch something, it has to be something I really love and brings me joy (or star Taron Egerton - because I really love him and he brings me joy). So this just felt like torture. A solid 3 star torture. 

4. Relic - I really like Emily Mortimer. She's just a really consistently strong under-rated actress. I actually questioned for a minute into in this if she was actually Australian - the accent just fits her so well. I also like Bella Heathcote (although I've always confused her with Bella Thorne and Bella Hadid - I've got them straightened out now: Heathcote is the one that can act, Thorne is the OnlyFans girl, and Hadid is the model who married one of the One Direction boys. NAILED IT. Oh wait...there's a different Hadid. I'm so old.). Anyway, this movie is ok - nothing special. I always get bored with these types of movies, anyway, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised by my indifference towards it. Old people (and kids) are super creepy - we get it. I hope when I get old someone just puts me in a nice home with a very large tv that I can stare at all day (and maybe a few cats that I can cuddle with?). The atmosphere is superbly creepy, but overall I don't think it offers anything new. I did like the end, though (although I hope it's not setting up for sequels - just leave it alone). 

5. Wild Mountain Thyme - I don't think I've ever seen a funnier trailer for a movie. I saw it trending on twitter - so I watched it and then thought it must be a parody (which is why it was trending, but no...it was trending because people were like "holy shit, this is a real movie!"). Widely criticized for the depiction of Irish people and the awful accents, my favorite comment is "this movie to Irish people is what Cats is to actual cats". Then it was released, and the dialogue changed to talk about a ridiculous twist - and boy, let me tell you, it is damn-near the craziest thing I've ever seen for a movie like this. And I'm going to spoil it for you - so if you really care, stop reading this, but honestly, it's so dumb and hilarious that you won't even believe it's real. OK...here goes: He thinks he's a bee. Really. You read that correctly. The whole movie leads you to question his "big secret" and the reveal is that HE THINKS HE'S A BEE. Oh, man, I'm laughing all over again just thinking about it. Anyway, as for the rest of this movie, it's all really bad. I think it would have been better if it was about people in their late teens/early 20s because none of this feels like actual adult interactions. I'm also not sure that I really understand the plot - why was he not going to inherit the farm? Just because he wasn't married? And how much time has gone by between scenes? Because sometimes they act like they haven't seen each other in ages, but they were just in the previous scene together (and they are neighbors...). I do like the intent behind the "twist", that people hide from their true identities and often imagine themselves living a different reality, but the execution of this idea is WILD. Also, this is the least sexy Jamie Dornan has ever been - and you'd think it would be the opposite with his Irish accent and lovely grey streak. I'm not sure I'll ever look at him the same after this bee fiasco. 

Thoughts on 5 Films

1. Ammonite - This feels like the Hollywood version of Portrait of a Lady on Fire - queer historical romance, but in English and with more well-known actors. I wasn't the biggest fan of that movie - I know, I know, bad cinephile! I acknowledge that it is a good film, but it's just not something that I connect to and I feel the same way about this. It's just really, really boring. It's most disappointing because Francis Lee's God's Own Country is an unforgettable film, so I was expecting more of the same. I think it's extremely weird that people had a meltdown at the age difference in Malcolm & Marie, but I heard nothing about this? A 20 year age gap is definitely more questionable (to each their own and all that, but when there is a whole adult gap between people, the power structure within the relationship is significant and can be an issue). Anyway, the acting is strong (because OF COURSE IT IS - two of the best actresses from their respective generations), and there are some lovely shots. I'm also impressed at how far they went with the sex scene. 

2. Cherry - *spoilers* This is just, flat-out, a terrible movie. It's really unfortunate. It's kind of crazy because I watched the movie and then a few days later I saw a trailer for it and I was like "ooooh what's this..it looks great..." only to realize it was for this movie. But just like the trailer - it has so many elements that should make it great. So...let's get into it. First, I adore Tom Holland (really, really adore), but I think he's miscast here. I think it's great that he's branching out, but sometimes it just doesn't work out. But I will say, he does such a good American accent and his voice is so soothing, which is important to me (seriously, accents and vocals are weirdly important for me to enjoy films/tv). Second, it's about one of my least favorite cliches - an entitled white boy drug addict. Now, I know it can be argued that his drug addiction is a coping mechanism for PTSD as a war veteran (which is NOT what I define as "entitled white boy drug addict" and is actually a far more interesting, but also mildly overdone topic), but he's a druggie before he joins the Army and the only reason he joins is because his girlfriend breaks up with him so she can go to college and become her own person (poor guy...). AND he has parents who are barely mentioned (probably because he'll lose the audience sympathy card), that BUY HIM A HOUSE. Sorry, but I don't feel any sympathy for him. Like, none whatsoever (and I just hummed "Cold Hearted" in my head - "C-c-c-c-cold-hearted...oh ah ah. C-c-c-cold-hearted...ssssnake"). Third, I would love to root for the love story here, because it starts off really sweat ("I think I adore you", so cute!), but then it just moves so quickly and they don't really give any reasons as to why exactly he's so smitten - she's cute and sweet, but it would have been great if she was given some depth (and that bow around her neck is less than subtle...). Fourth, those war scenes are rough. Just cliche after cliche ("I've got you" - I honestly, almost laughed out loud). Fifth, that asshole shot...is...a choice (WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK?? Whose idea was that and why didn't anyone talk them out of it?). Sixth, the bank robbing scenes are just really unbelievable and full of other less than subtle anti-capitalism dialogue and imagery ("Capitalist One" and "Bank Fucks America" are the bank names. Seriously). Seventh (I think? I may have lost count), those breaking the 4th wall moments are especially jarring and unnecessary - we already know what is going through his head because the entire movie is Obvious. Okay...I think I'm done now. It's a shame that this is based on a true and probably incredible story - to turn this story into this is just catastrophic. 

3. Promising Young Woman - *also spoilers* I thought that I was going to be disappointed by this - sometimes when things reach a certain critical level, I feel like expectations get too high and then are sadly not met. So I sort of prepared for that with this. I'm so happy to say that I absolutely freaking loved it with all my heart. It's dark but also very funny, and there are so many moments of pure genius. Carey Mulligan is the best she's ever been - and I actually think this is the first role that I really felt like she became a different person. She also felt like a very real person - someone that I (and many women) can connect to. I don't always feel it's necessary for women to direct stories about women, but I think it's interesting how obvious it is that a woman directed this. Most of it is felt in the details - like her multi-colored nail polish. But I think the biggest "detail" is the casting of the male characters. There's this misconception that women should have some sort of instinctual talent in knowing if men are assholes and this movie challenges that idea by having the "nice guys" as not just the traditional movie "nice guys", but guys who are most famous for roles that everyone (men and women) would describe as "harmless". Adam Brody, best known as Seth Cohen from The O.C. (one of the greatest shows ever. Period.), Christopher Mintz-Plasse, who will never overcome his "McLovin" nickname, and Max Greenfield, otherwise known as Schmidt from New Girl are exactly the type of guys women are told to date if they don't want to be treated like shit (I assume Bo Burnham falls into this category as well, but I'm not really familiar with him). The point is that if we can't even trust the "harmless" guys, then who exactly can we trust? And I think it's a direct rebuttal on the "not all men" attitude, because OF COURSE it's NOT ALL MEN, but...um...*whispers* it actually kind of is? This is highlighted again towards the end when she confronts Burnham's character with his past and he replies "you've never done anything you're ashamed of?", which is very telling (as if being ashamed of a mistake is the same as watching someone being raped and not doing anything about it). The complicity aspect is a great angle, too, because I don't think people like to think about their own involvement. And the film includes women in this, which is very important. But the aspect of the film I love the most is that it isn't this woman going full psychopath and assaulting/murdering sexual assaulters (which I know is what some people were expecting and were very disappointed...that this woman isn't a murderer...sorry?). Instead, she's forcing people to take responsibility for their actions, confront their own ugly realities, and maybe become the people they think they are? I find it sort of hopeful, honestly. And that's rare for movies like this. I will say that the only real fault in the film is the ending - the convenience of it all felt really inauthentic compared to the rest of the movie. But, it's also sort of cheeky and sarcastic - so I don't exactly hate it, but it's just not as perfect as everything that comes before it. 

4. The Informer - Predictably terrible - but I had to watch a movie with Ana de Armas and Joel Kinnaman! This is just really dull and I couldn't even follow the plot. I knew what was happening overall, but the character motivations are non-existent. It's a movie that I should like because the plot is right up my alley (It's basically The Departed, which is still in my Top 5 movies of all time). And obviously Joel and Ana are wonderful (and Ana's hair is GLORIOUS), unfortunately the movie also has Common and Rosamund Pike - and they are both awful (not as awful as the girl who plays opposite of Common - wow...that accent...). I don't really have anything else to say, which really tells you everything you need to know. 

5. Another Round - I enjoyed this movie a lot. For a story about four middle-aged men stuck in a rut, it's surprisingly original. I feel like it's a very real, honest discussion about alcohol as they embark on a social experiment to see how daily consumption effects their lives. And it's super rare for stories to admit that sometimes it does...make things better. Everyone has a different relationship with alcohol, but there is something to be said for controlled consumption (for some people). There are a lot of people who are considered "the greatest" of their field (whether its artists, writers, musicians, inventors, etc.) who have admitted that alcohol helps them succeed. I think the problem happens when it is no longer controlled and if you are someone who doesn't have self-discipline or if you have addictive tendencies, then this is when it becomes harmful to you and most likely everyone around you. Anyway, this movie is really sweet but also heartbreaking, has some very thoughtful and complicated dialogue, and Mads is wonderful (of course). However, the last 5 minutes is just a breathtaking piece of cinema - I think the directing nomination is for these 5 minutes alone. The camera-work, Mads dancing along to the perfect song, and the pure emotion being expressed - I could have watched it for hours. 

Thoughts on 5 Films

1. Supernova - I honestly can not think of two straight men who make a better couple than Colin Firth and Stanley Tucci?. They are just perfect together. Firth is so good in movies like this - it is really reminiscent of his performance in A Single Man, which is one of my favorite performances of all-time (and also the subject matter is sort of similar). This performance is heavy and emotional, but never over-dramatic. But it's Tucci that really stands out, for me. The scene in which Firth reads the speech that he wrote, how he sits there and quietly shakes - it just broke my heart. Dementia is just the worst - and I've said this before, but I feel exactly the way Tucci's character does. I would want to die before the dementia fully set in. Anyway, I like this movie a lot, but I would have preferred some more scenes between our main couple over all of the shots of them driving. I understand that the location they are in is very beautiful (apparently the Lake District in England - I looked it up because it felt like a third main character), but it just became too repetitive - just shot after shot of the RV driving down a tiny road. I also wish the ending had a stronger impact. I am surprised that this movie didn't receive more attention, though, because it seems like something that critics would love. 

2. The United States Vs. Billie Holiday - I know I shouldn't be surprised that the Golden Globes gave an award for this performance, but it's still sort of stunning. If she gets the Oscar, I may just be done with award shows for a while (probably not though, I'm an award show addict). I think Andra Day was obviously a great casting choice, and from what I've read, she really gave it her all and really immersed herself in becoming Billie Holiday. However, the movie is an absolute mess. It's far too long, repetitive, the editing is so atrocious (what are those awkward black & white scenes that are shoehorned in??), and the dialogue is so...stale? It felt like I knew what everyone was going to say before they said it. Day does a wonderful job with the songs & performances, but when it comes to the actual acting part...I'm not so sure. But I think most of that is a dialogue and director issue - especially since Day is new to acting; I think it is definitely someone else's fault that most of it feels really inauthentic. It's always disappointing when a biopic offers absolutely nothing of value (neither educational or entertaining). I admittedly don't know much about Billie Holiday - so I should, in theory, be fascinated by this whole story because it is such an incredible story - and I would happily watch a different movie about her (maybe someone will make a good one? Or has there already been? I feel like I may have read about Diana Ross playing Holiday at some point? Will look into it). This film severely lacks depth and direction, and overall is everything I hate about biopics. 

3. Antebellum - I'm not really sure how I feel about this movie. I read some truly scathing reviews for it that I can nod my head in agreement with, but I watched this 10 days ago and something about it has stuck with me. So, it's not a complete failure, for me. I think part of that is that I didn't know anything about the movie - I really thought I was watching a movie about the horrors of slavery. So, when the modern day twist happens, I perked up with an appreciation for something different. But then, something about it just doesn't work. I think partly because the whole thing feels exploitative, partly a little too heavy-handed, and ultimately, because Get Out does the same thing in a much more interesting way. It fails in balancing being a provocative social commentary and a horror film. The idea is there, though, and it could have been great if it chose one direction or the other. The cast is great - Janelle Monae, Jena Malone, Jack Huston, and one of my favorite young actresses - Kiersey Clemons. I will say that I absolutely hated her friends - especially the one played by Gabourey Sidibe. I don't understand why she was so obnoxiously rude to everyone? Is it supposed to be funny? But even though I hated them, I wish they showed more of what was happening on the "outside". Maybe that's what was missing? On a slightly spoilery side note - I don't understand the appeal of Civil War reenactments. Acknowledging history is important, but this tradition is weird and unnecessary. 

4. The White Tiger - I like this movie - it's like a combination of The Great Gatsby and Slumdog Millionaire, and it works really well. I wasn't the biggest fan of Slumdog Millionaire, as I felt that it was really contrived and inauthentic. This, however, feels a little more real to me. I went to India a little over 4 years ago and I think the best way to describe it is overwhelming. It's pure sensory overload. And, as this film shows, the class distinction is palpable. I was there for a very extravagant wedding thrown by a wealthy family. We had a driver to bring us anywhere we wanted to go, and while it was overall a lovely experience, it also felt very strange to just have someone waiting at our beck and call. This movie follows the story of a driver trying to break through his life circumstance and find success (a very typical "rags to riches" story). So much of it is done so well, but perhaps my favorite part is the scenes with Priyanka Chopra (and not just because I love her and she is gorgeous. I seriously sat through all of Quantico for her. And the other hot people on that show, of course). The way this character thinks that she's being helpful and empathetic by calling out the unfairness of the situation, and the mistreatment of the workers, but in reality she's just as condescending and entitled - it's fascinating to watch (and very smart commentary on people who think they are "woke"). The first hour is really exciting, layered, gorgeous, and darkly funny. Unfortunately, the second hour doesn't live up to the beginning - it's not bad or anything, it just goes nowhere and starts to feel repetitive until the very end. Adarsh Gourav is perfect in the leading role - as someone who you really want to root for. He has a very sinister charm to him that is very engaging. 

5. Coming 2 America - This is exactly what I was expecting - which wasn't much. I giggled at a few jokes, I groaned at a few jokes, and I cried with laughter at two jokes: (1) the soldiers working out with the shake weights. I can't stop thinking about it. It's just so funny. And (2) "Zamunda, Wakanda, Connecticut" (this one was just more of the way he said it). I know people are upset about the transgender joke "they can turn a penis into a vagina now...that's science!", but in terms of trans jokes...that's not really that bad?? I get that people feel like there are just certain things that we, as an advanced society, should not joke about, but it's just not realistic. There's always going to be trans jokes, just like there will always be rape jokes, and they'll probably never be funny. Although, I also thought joking about 9/11 is something only an insane person would attempt but Kumail Nanjiani proved me wrong in The Big Sick. I don't know what my point is or if I even have one - I guess, I just don't see the point in getting so offended over jokes; it seems exhausting. Anyway, I expected some non PC jokes in this, and for the most part, I thought it was pretty tame. I loved the guest stars - especially the musical acts (I won't spoil it). But, after a while (I'm not sure the exact pinpoint) it got really, really boring. Still a solid 3 star movie, though. 

Oscar Nominations: The Good, The Bad, and The Snubbed

I'll keep this brief since I already said what I had to say in my Golden Globes post, but here are my thoughts on the Oscar nominations: 

The Good

- My two favorite acting performances both received nominations (I think it's been a long while since that's happened!): Riz Ahmed & Vanessa Kirby 

- LaKeith Stanfield getting in a Supporting Actor nod! I was not expecting that, but it's definitely just as deserving as Kaluuya - although, I'm nervous they might cancel each other out when it comes to voting 

- I haven't written down my thoughts for The White Tiger yet (maybe later today), but I really, really liked it. I'm glad to see it got something. But I also wish it wasn't eligible for this year since it's 2021 (this and Judas really messes up my whole system) 

- Emma. for Costume Design. I'm really hoping for a win here. 

The Bad

- Seriously, 10 Oscar nominations for Mank? I take comfort in the fact that it's not really expected to win any of them, but still. 

- Over the Moon is not good - poorly animated, incomprehensible plot points, and just overall...not good

-  I didn't hate on Hillbilly Elegy as much as the chorus of critics did, but if anyone is deserving of an award for that, surely it's Amy Adams? Glenn Close is a legend, but her performance is a little too over-done in this, and it's nominated for a Razzie (which is hilarious. Has that been done before? I feel like it has, but I can't remember) 

- Why nominate only 8 films for Best Picture? - there is definitely a ton of other films that deserved the empty 2 slots 

- I'm really mad about Andra Day, you guys. It's another bland biopic performance just like Renee Zellweger last year and Rami Malek the year before. But I'm really just frustrated because one of the reasons given by "experts" for the Academy snubbing Taron Egerton last year is because Rami won for too similar of a role the year before. So, now what's the excuse?? (and no, I will never get over this)

- Sacha Baron Cohen for The Trial of the Chicago 7? Really?...okay then 

The Snubbed

- I think it's odd that The Devil All the Time has been completely overlooked. I know that I liked it more than most, but it still had fairly good reviews (it had far better reviews than Hillbilly Elegy and that still managed an acting nod). 

- One Night in Miami deserved more - King for a directing nomination, and I would have chosen a different performance to nominate (literally any of the other three over Leslie Odom Jr.)

- As many have noted, the biggest, but most expected snub is Delroy Lindo for Da 5 Bloods - I wasn't as in love with the film as some, but this is a performance of a lifetime 

- I was really hoping for a sneaky nomination for Nicole Beharie, but I knew it was very unlikely

Thoughts on 5 Films

1. Miss Juneteenth - This quickly became one of my most anticipated movies after watching Nicole Beharie give a performance of a lifetime in Monsterland - I'm still so sad that she received absolutely zero recognition for it (but I think that happens when a series is overall mediocre, which is what Monsterland ended up being). I was so happy that she received at least a little buzz for this movie, and I was pretty confident that she deserved it. I am happy to report that I loved this movie and her performance. It feels really genuine and heartwarming, without being cheesy. I love the way the mother/daughter relationship is portrayed with love but also with a very typical tension that exists between mothers and teenage daughters. I'm not a big fan of the whole pageant thing (in real life, not necessarily in the film), but when it's about a scholarship, I get the appeal (and there's usually a commitment to volunteering and service work that goes along with winning pageants, too, so I guess...they are ok? There are worse things in the world to focus on, I guess). I like how it plays into this story, though. How this mother projects her own "failure" onto her daughter, and also questions the reality of this "failure" (as in, it's not a failure at all. It reminds me of the quote from Little Fires Everywhere, "You didn't make good choices, you had good choices". I'm sure that quote existed before Little Fires Everywhere, but the impact it had on that show is unforgettable). *spoiler ahead* I knew the daughter was not going to win, because that's not the type of movie that this is. I also knew she was going to do the dance, and I was HERE FOR IT. I love that she combined the poem with it - just absolutely stunning. And Nicole's reaction is perfect - a combination of being proud and frustrated at the same time. She is the real deal. I can't wait to see more from her. 

2. How to Build a Girl - Worst movie I've seen in a long time. I don't usually update my annual "Worst of" list, but this would have definitely been on it. I like Beanie Feldstein (a lot), and she gives this movie her all, but this character and story is just so unlikeable (and I think we're supposed to like her, for the most part...). Her accent sounds fine (to me, an American), but it just doesn't fit her at all, so I found it really distracting. And she's surprisingly convincing as a 16 year old, even though she's a decade older, but I think that's because I've only seen her in teenage roles (Lady Bird, Booksmart). I would love to see her in an actual adult role soon. Anyway, it's really the story that I have a problem with - the whole concept is that "a nice girl gets nowhere, but a bitch can make a comeback". Unfortunately, there is some truth to that sentiment - it is definitely more popular to write snark and make fun of things than it is to celebrate something, but there should be a balance. Criticism is essential (I get annoyed by people who are like "only talk about what you love", "stop being negative" - that's just dumb), but I do think sometimes it turns unnecessarily mean (I'm guilty of it myself, but I certainly don't do it for popularity...obvi...there are like 5 people who read this blog). The movie just takes this idea to an extreme and it's all really cringey. And it feels dated (it takes place in the 90s, but it should still feel fresh for an audience in the present day). And I don't understand why she dresses like a magicians assistant? Is she supposed to be fashionable? Or quirky? I don't get it. 

3. I Care a Lot - *slight spoilers* This is the most divisive movie I've seen in a while - people I trust with movies have rated it either 1/2 a star or 4 stars and there doesn't seem to be any middle ground. I am the middle ground - I think it's an average 3 star movie that could have easily been 2 1/2 stars if not for some spectacular supporting performances and a well-done ending. I've said it before - so this won't be shocking, but I think Rosamund Pike is one of the worst actresses that is consistently over-praised. It's a very unpopular opinion, I know, but I stand by it. But, Dianne Wiest is spectacular (and delivers one of the best lines with such perfection "have at it, you little crock of cunt" - she deserves an Oscar for that alone), Chris Messina steals every scene, and Eiza Gonzalez is so fucking gorgeous it hurts. I also like the story - I'm not sure why it seems so controversial. Bad people doing bad things isn't exactly new territory. It's interesting the way it twists & turns into a story of karma (potentially) paying off. I'm not the sort of viewer who needs to root for a character to enjoy the story. And there is definitely nobody to root for in this story. I do have a problem with several critics describing the main character as "ambitious", though. That's just dangerous language to use for a criminal - you wouldn't call a bank robber "ambitious", right? I think my biggest problem with the movie isn't that the main character is ruthless, but that she's dumb - and actually, everyone in it is dumb. None of it is believable in any way. I know the American legal system is fucked, but it would take way more than one little hearing to just have this woman's entire life taken away from her. And, as if I couldn't hate Pike enough already, her thanking America's broken legal system in her Golden Globes speech, as if this story could happen in real life is kind of funny (and also if she thinks that and is thankful for it because it allowed her to win an award for a movie, I will kindly tell her to get fucked.). Also, it's the Russian mob for Christ's sake - I'm pretty sure she would have been dead within the first few minutes of them finding her. The fact that they don't kill her before pushing her car into a lake is just dumb. It's all just dumb, but entertainingly so. 

4. Nomadland - Honestly, I had a feeling that I wouldn't connect with this, but I was hoping that I was wrong. It just looked so slow and painful, and someone described it as having "a Terrence Malick vibe", so that instantly put me off to it. Unfortunately it's exactly as I expected. It's very well-made, with some lovely shots, and a moving performance from Frances McDormand. But, it's also a very unmemorable, slow-moving character study of someone that I found little connection to. And to be even more harsh - to me, it feels elitist and exploitative. While this woman has a devastating story to tell (the loss of her husband as well as a financial downfall), it's a story, and to use real people living like this (most of the supporting actors are "real" nomads) to tell a romanticized tale of "van life", just feels wrong to me. Also, this woman has several people who try to help her, including family members, and she declines - which is a privilege that most of these people don't have. There are obviously people who happily choose to live off the land, but, again, it's just not something I connect to (sorry, I need stuff - electricity, heat, PLUMBING. I mean, really, who wants to see Frances McDormand shit in a bucket?). But on a positive note, I have an extreme hatred of the desert so it's hard for me to see the beauty in it, but this movie does have some really breathtaking cinematography. And there are these really small moments where Frances McDormand has these flutters of giddiness that are just pure joy to watch. 

5. Black Bear - FUCKING YES!!! I love this movie so much. I went into it completely blind and I highly suggest you do too, so if you haven't seen it - please stop reading. During the beginning of this movie, I was convince that I was going to full-force hate it - the plot is just such a dumb love triangle between really annoying and unlikeable characters. The notes that I was taking just went into full rant mode on how I hate cliched jealous female characters and I'm so tired of these stories, but then the story just escalates so quickly and I could not for the life of me figure out where the story was going to go next - and I have to say that it completely shocked me. In such a good way. And if you love filmmaking, then you will absolutely love this. I'm still not going to spoil it just in case you're still reading this and you shouldn't be. I'll just say that the story is very trippy and circular in narrative, and can be interpreted in many ways, which is wonderful. Also, I'm still willing to give Aubrey Plaza another chance - even though I think she plays the same character (i.e herself) in every project (and yes, I've seen Legion and I think she's terrible in it). But I feel like she's growing, and this is a great project for her to show her range - it's still not great (and I think this could have been even better with a stronger lead), but I can see the improvement and I love that. Also, if you told me that Christopher Abbott would be in two of my favorite films from 2020 (this and Possessor), I would not believe you. I'm highly interested in his next career move. 

4 Thoughts on The Golden Globes

1. The Host(s) - I was actually a little excited to watch this only because it felt like it might bring a little bit of normalcy to my life. I love watching awards shows, and even though they are not able to do them the "normal" way, I'm glad that they continued the tradition (I was against the idea at first, and thought it should have all just been cancelled/postponed). I love Tina Fey and Amy Poehler, but they have disappointed me with their hosting duties in the past. They did a decent job with this. I mean, they did the best they could, I think, for this situation. I don't like the split screen - I wish they just took turns saying what they had to say. Or had the backgrounds be completely different? Because it made me dizzy looking at it for too long. But I'm glad that they took some necessary digs at the hot garbage that is the Golden Globes. The went from swiping at the nominations for James Corden, Music, and Emily in Paris to downright saying "a lot of flashy garbage was nominated". LOL. The Golden Globes have been a mess for at least a decade - and probably even before that, but I was maybe a bit ignorant to it? But I'm not sure why it took so long for anyone to seriously address it and demand action? It just keeps getting "pointed out" every year that the HFP is made up of mostly old, white men and that they can be easily swayed with swag and such, but...then it's just dropped until the next year until it's "pointed out" again. But maybe now since it's being called out during the actual show, things might change? I'll believe it when I see it. 

2. The Show - Such a chaotic show, and in no way should it have been 3 hours long. I think the biggest takeaway from this is that The Emmys really did such a fantastic job under the same circumstances. Aside from the numerous technical glitches, it felt like no-one had any control in the beginning - and everything was so dragged out because of this, so they had to start playing every single winner off during the last half of the show (which didn't even work. Could the winners even hear the music? I prefer Don Cheadle's solution with his wrap it up hand motions. They should have had someone doing that in every category). I love Maya Rudolph and her muumuus (and her 3 shoes lol), but what was that sketch? I didn't have a clue what was happening and it lasted like 10 whole minutes (I may be exaggerating it). The doctor/celebrity symptoms sketch was really cringe at first, but it ended on a strong note - Glen Close getting offended at being called "over 70" - *gasps* "I'm 45!" and then the nurse's reaction to Andrew Rannell introducing himself *blank stares* "oookay". Overall, it was good, cheesy fun. 

3. The Winners - Okay, so after all the garbage nominations - the actual winners didn't end up being so bad? Not that I actually agree with the winners, but they didn't let James Corden, Music or Emily in Paris actually win anything, so that's, at the very least, a win for the audience. I actually can't think of one category that I agree with the winning pick (out of those nominated) except Supporting Actor going to Daniel Kaluuya. But, I'll also never be mad at The Crown or Schitt's Creek getting wins. I do admit that it's frustrating to see performances that I hate win awards - Rosamund Pike...UGH. Emma Corrin...UGH. Andra Day...UGH. Julia Garner...UGH - oh wait...did Julia Garner NOT WIN?! Thank fuck. Also, this makes it seem like I hate women, but I'm positive that I can probably say the same thing about Sacha Baron Cohen and Jason Sudeikis, but I haven't seen the Borat sequel or Ted Lasso yet. And while we are on the subject of women vs men, when the fuck are awards shows going to stop having gendered acting categories? I've been saying this for decades...but it's even more relevant now? No other profession would separate your job performance by your gender (except in physical sports, which is the only place it makes sense). It's barbaric, really. And going back to my frustration with the winners - I'll never understand the love for Rosamund Pike. She's a terrible actress. And I just watched The United States Vs. Billie Holiday a few hours before the awards, and it is a mess of a film, saved from complete disaster, by a mediocre performance by Day (more on this when I post my thoughts). How that could win over Vanessa Kirby's gut-wrenching performance in Pieces of a Woman? Make it make sense?! Day's win was definitely the shock of the night, but I think we should have seen it coming - the Globes do like to shock with its wins - and remained fairly predictable for the whole night (except for Jodie Foster's win). I haven't written down my thoughts on Nomadland yet, but it's...okay. I'm genuinely baffled as to why it's a frontrunner for winning a director/picture Oscar. 

4. The Fashion - So down to the important stuff, right? RIGHT??? Obviously, I'm kidding, but I genuinely love fashion so, for me, awards shows are always fun to see new trends, gorgeous gowns, and stunning jewelry. But, I honestly kind of wish that the celebrities all followed Jason Sudeikis and Jeff Daniels and said "fuck it". I think it would have been more fun to see them at home, relaxed, makeup off, hair a mess. They always try to pass off as "real people", and this was the perfect time to accentuate that. A few other people pulled this off with a natural, genuine effect - like Jodie Foster (loved her whole vibe), but some decided to go all out - I'm talking to you, Anya Taylor-Joy. She looked absolutely jaw-droppingly stunning, but if felt really unnecessary. Although, I do understand that this is an important moment for them and if they want to dress to the nines, then who are we to judge? I also think that Anya is the only one who had a professional lighting team with her because she is the only one who actually looked good on Zoom (such a feat! Nobody looks good on Zoom). My favorite dress, though, is definitely the one that Gillian Anderson wore because it had a sneaky skull design on it - and  love a good fashionable skull print. And as far as the actual presenters who actually had a reason to dress up - everyone looked fantastic. I love the highlighter green dress that Cynthia Erivo wore, Rosie Perez looked incredible, Tiffany Haddish - stunning. But the real highlight was Jane Fonda, because hot damn. I remember when everyone mocked her for those aerobics videos, but I might have to seek some of them out, because she's definitely in better shape than I am.