Thoughts on 5 Films

1. Land - I love Robin Wright and I love that so many women are stepping behind the camera! But this is...unfortunately, just really boring. It reminded me of that Reese Witherspoon movie where she goes on a long hike for self-redemption crap. This movie focuses more on grief, but it's still the same idea of forcing yourself into nature as some sort of torture. Actually, now that I'm thinking about it, it's actually like a more subtle version of Nomadland, but not as pretty looking. I think I would like the quietness and stillness of being out in the wild. And I love being alone. But I'm not really a survivalist - her trying to chop wood is exactly how I would look trying to chop wood. And I could never kill my own food. I would just go full vegetarian, I think. Anyway, I like the ideas of the movie but it's nothing really new and it moves really slowly. And it's certainly not memorable in any way. Just all around disappointing. 

2. 8-Bit Christmas - Super, super cute Christmas movie. It felt like a classic family-oriented feel-good movie or like a really long episode of The Goldbergs (but...not Jewish, obviously). The main kid is really adorable (he's the kid from Nightbooks! He's like a mini Patton Oswald). There's some really funny dialogue ("it's not even below zero!") and nostalgia filled moments (like him blowing into the video game). I didn't have a Nintendo, but my cousin did, and I do vividly remember enjoying playing Super Mario Bros, but also somehow video games were just never really my thing. I tried to play Mario Kart a few years ago and it's still...just not my thing. Anyway, my favorite part was the Encyclopedia prize because I knew that obviously the BIG prize was not going to be a Nintendo, so I kept racking my brain for what it was going to be - never guessing the most obvious and perfect thing....Encyclo-freakin'-pedias. Honestly, at that age I would have preferred them over a Nintendo (I was such a dork, but like a cool dork. I think? I was never really made fun of and I had friends, but I loved learning shit). Actually, the Encyclopedia bit was my second favorite part, because obviously the end is just spectacular. I almost cried. Man, I wish I had a childhood like that. 

3. The Unforgivable - *slight spoilers* I just love Sandy B so, so, so much. Honestly though, I prefer her in lighter comedy roles or fun action type films. I understand why she wanted to break free from the roles she was being relegated to, but she is so damn good at them and sometimes people are better off "staying in their lane" so to speak. I just don't think dramas are the best roles for her (but what do I know, she got an Oscar for doing drama - she's never going to get an Oscar for doing movies like Speed or The Heat). I like this story a lot. There is a lot to be said within stories of redemption, and I think this movie gets a lot of things right with how we treat ex-convicts and how terrible our prisoner release program works. And while it has nothing to do with this particular story, the problem is so much deeper particularly with women doing time for killing their abusive partners. Every case is different, and I'm not saying that prison isn't sometimes a necessary step, but what are we doing for people after they are rehabilitated (if they are rehabilitated - again, a whole other topic). I like that this story shows the ugly side of people - and just how mean and unforgiving we can be. It's also weird to see people mad that someone is basically living in poverty and working in a factory (not exactly what anyone would describe as a "good" life). She's still clearly suffering for her so-called sins. If it kept the focus on this it would probably be among my favorites of the year. But instead it gets really melodramatic with the family seeking revenge (this whole plot is also not believable at all) and the brother sleeping with the other brother's wife. It's all just so unnecessary. The ending is great, though. I should have called it, but I totally wasn't expecting it. Also, Viola Davis is INCREDIBLY under-utilized. 

4. Candyman (2021) - Well, with the mediocre reception, I was expecting mediocre, and that is exactly what I got. I had no idea that it's a sequel, though. I assumed it was a remake - I think that's how it was advertised...right? Or am I crazy? I didn't find out until I went to press play and saw it in the description. It's kind of sad because there is so much you can do with a Candyman sequel 30 years later, but instead...we get this? It's...nothing? Everything about it is just so dull, including the flat characters. It just got so boring pretty quickly (I think I was about 30 minutes in when I started to zone out...). There's also some really poorly done scenes, like the scene with the art critic and his intern - it's barely watchable. Poorly acted and poorly edited. It's also not scary at all. I wasn't exactly scared by the original either, but it definitely has some creepy shit in it. With this one, I could not tell you one single scary moment. I think it's so weird that Nia DaCosta landed a huge Marvel project (The Marvels) with so little under her belt (just this and Little Woods, which was...okay?). It's like setting someone up to fail, in my opinion. I will tell you, though, Teyonah Parris is stunning. 

5. The Voyeurs - I liked this way more than I thought I would. It's a very sexy erotic thriller, and those are hard to find nowadays. It also surprised me in a lot of ways, which is exciting because I thought I knew the story and I assumed it was going to be incredibly predictable. I really like Sydney Sweeney and she has literally the most perfect body - that perfect combination of skinny and curvy. She really holds this whole movie together because it definitely could be a terrible movie - I feel like it sits right on that weird line of being technically bad, but somehow really entertaining. Because aside from the unexpected turns and Sweeney's excellence, there are some really terrible parts. For one, the guy who plays her boyfriend (Justice Smith) is God-awful and he has one of those voices that makes my ears bleed. There's some rough dialogue (although I did like the line "I would argue that most penises aren't connected to a brain"). *spoilers ahead* And as much as I like how it ends, it's not exactly realistic in any way (I'm pretty sure tricking someone into signing a legal document is considered fraud or at least some sort of false pretense thing - and she can easily prove she was tricked). Also, when she goes to his place and acts all coy and dumb as if she doesn't know exactly what's going to happen...is weird and it feels out of character. But, it's hot. And they are hot. So I'll stop complaining about that. It's also hilarious that Ben Hardy is in this; I didn't realize it until it's almost over because he's so far away for the whole thing. And then that scene happens and I was like "OH SHIT that guy is hot...wait is that Ben Hardy?!!". And finally, none of this would have happened if people just CLOSED THEIR CURTAINS. I'll never understand this as a plot device. I always have my blinds closed or opened but angled upwards so you can't see directly in. Like a fucking normal person.  

Thoughts on 5 New TV Shows

1. Foundation - I thought that this would get better as it went along - sometimes it takes a few episodes to build a new world within a science-fiction premise, but this just really doesn't get better. Even after 8 episodes (out of 10), more than enough time to find the right balance and groove, it's just so dull and, honestly, dumb. I don't even get what it's trying to do aside from being a really bad knock-off of The Expanse. It's based on an Asimov story (so technically The Expanse is a rip-off of it, I do realize this, but from a tv series perspective it's basically The Expanse but not nearly as good). The cast is a big part of the problem - I love Lee Pace, I really do. And I appreciated his villainous role in the MCU, but I like him more as a lovable pie maker (Pushing Daisies is one of the best series ever). He overdoes the villain thing here, and I just simply don't like it. The rest of the cast are mostly unknown actors (at least to me), and none of them are making any sort of impact (oh wait there is the kid from How to Get Away with Murder. He's okay, I guess). Each episode just gets more boring than the next. Then the final two episodes are MUCH better - but it just took so long to get there. 

2. The Problem with Jon Stewart - I used to love The Daily Show when Jon Stewart hosted, but honestly I find it mostly unwatchable now. Stewart had a way of being smarter than everyone in the room, but not making everyone feel like idiots...if that makes sense? I don't like being talked down to, especially when politics are concerned because it's definitely not my area of expertise, but that doesn't make me stupid, ya know? I feel like that's the problem with all these types of shows now - they thrive on feeling superior. And I think it's what is causing an even bigger divide in our country. Stewart just always came across as more level-headed, even when he was completely destroying something, so I'm happy to have him back. He's also done some incredible things for veterans and 9/11 first responders. So far, I really like what he's doing here - he's focusing on the big issues in our country, asking thoughtful questions, and promoting resources that are offering help. He's also just really, really fucking funny (I laughed so hard with his "this is what I look like now" and I practically cried with laughter when he makes fun of performative patriotism and Taylor Swift's heart hands). I haven't watched them all yet, but the gun violence episode is especially hard to watch - by focusing on the victims, which is often women (their domestic partners often being the perpetrator). The women spoke so eloquently about their situation and highlighted the fact that neither of them had been physically abused by their partners before being shot. It's frustrating that Stewart calls this an "unseen, unheard epidemic" because women have been screaming about this for decades, but it's fascinating that someone like Stewart (an often ally to women's causes) is stunned by what these women tell him. So, I guess, we just need to keep screaming? 

3. I Know What You Did Last Summer - What in the actual fuck is going on with this show, and why is it even related to one of my favorite 90s horror movies? It has nothing to do with it except sharing a title? I guess it kind of starts off the same with four teenagers hitting someone with their car, hiding the body, and then going about their lives, but it's not really told in a "horror" style. And there is NO guy with a hook for a hand, which is the ICONIC part of the original movie (that and Ryan Phillippe in a white tank top, and Jennifer Love Hewitt screaming "What do you want from me???", oh and the beginnings of one of my favorite Hollywood couples - Sarah Michelle Gellar and Freddie Prinze Jr. Almost 20 years and they are still going strong! I love them so much.). Instead, this has more similarities to a different SMG project - the one in which she swaps lives with her twin (sorry, I can't for the life of me remember what it's called). It's poorly acted, full of dull dialogue, and there is absolutely nothing scary about it (gore does not equal scary!). AND WORST OF ALL none of the actors are hot?! It doesn't always matter, but it absolutely matters in movies like this - and...I guess that's all I'll say because if I go further I fear it will be a bit mean-spirited. 

4. Yellowjackets - I've only seen the first two episodes, so far, but it is really fucking good and I'm going to try and watch it slowly so I can savor it. It's like Lost and "The Lord of the Flies", set in the 90s and present day. There's a mystery building within, and it's super creepy with a hint of sci-fi elements. It's fascinating that a show starring Juliette Lewis, Christina Ricci and Melanie Lynskey is fairly under the radar, while other shows get endlessly discussed (ahem...Succession). The young cast is really great too - the one girl is from Army of the Dead and I remarked then about how she reminded me of Marion Cotillard, and it's even more so here. I don't have a whole lot to say yet, but I think this series might end up as one of my favorites. 

5. Hawkeye -  I can't decide if I like this yet (I haven't finished it - I think I have two episodes left? It's a pretty short series, right?). From all of the Marvel television projects recently (WandaVision, Loki, The Falcon and the Winter Soldier), this one feels the most Marvel-y. It's very predictable, the dialogue is cheesy, but it's very watchable, fun and entertaining. Hawkeye is probably my favorite of the original Avengers (is that controversial?? I feel like I've never seen anyone else say that), but part of that is because I've always really liked Jeremy Renner. I also really like Hailee Steinfeld in Dickinson (not so much in any other project), and she's ok here - I feel like she does her best with the awful dialogue that she's given so any cringey parts aren't necessarily her fault. I think I will always have a problem when a 100lb tiny woman takes down dozens of men unless they have a super power (sure she's trained in martial arts, but...still...as Hawkeye says "she's like 9"). Some other thoughts I have: Rogers: The Musical might be the funniest thing Marvel's ever done. Vera Farmiga is always The Best. And...I'm pretty good at avoiding spoilers for most things, but I think everything Marvel has done has been...predictable. I mean, they are less than subtle, when it comes to how everything is connected. And with all the talk of a multi-verse in the new Spider-Man (I have not seen it, but I know what's in it without being told...because...again...predictable). So as soon as they showed The Hint, I knew it was Kingpin (he either shows up in this or Spider-Man). I also knew that meant that Daredevil would be back (most likely in Spider-Man). I am happy about that - even though the final season of Daredevil was a dud, I still really liked it as a whole. 

Thoughts on 5 Films

1. Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings - I liked this movie - it's a solid 3 star film, but it's absolutely insane to me that on Letterboxd over 36k users rate this movie 5 stars. INSANE. I like Letterboxd a lot (I've had it for years, but I only just started regularly using it this year) - I appreciate that I can see film fans review something and actual critics. But I am genuinely concerned for the future of movies if this is considered a "perfect" film. Anyway...as I said, I liked this! I didn't really have much interest nor did I really have any knowledge of the character, but I think it's a welcomed addition to the Marvel movies and I'm excited to see how this will play into the future of these movies. The cast is excellent - Simu Liu has a TON of charisma, Michelle Yeoh is a legend, and I think it's hilarious that they brought back Ben Kingsley. However, I cringed when I saw Awkwafina, though, and horrified once I realized she was going to be a huge part of the movie. She's fine in this - almost a little muted from her normal screechiness (sorry, her voice bothers me). The action sequences and the fight scenes are stellar as expected, especially the fight scene on the bus (just executed to perfection). Like most Marvel movies, it's a tad too long, the dialogue is iffy in parts, and it's all very expected. I do like the idea that "if you aim at nothing, you'll hit nothing" - that's actually a little motivating and a great life lesson. 

2. King Richard - Another solidly flat 3 star movie. There's definitely something interesting about it - I find it funny how "the internet" (and even people who are usually more level-headed on my twitter feed) commented how "problematic" it is to do a movie about the father of two of the greatest athletes of all time, instead of doing a movie about them (arguing sexism, I guess?), but Venus and Serena are PRODUCERS on the movie and are fully supportive of the story being told, as they say "there would be no Venus and Serena without Richard". It's part of this whole mob mentality to automatically get offended by something because one person calls it out as "problematic" (just like when everyone questioned why a white woman, Rebecca Hall, was directing Passing, only to find out that her grandfather is black and can "pass", and therefore it's an interesting and personal topic for her). I think it's actually a really interesting way to tell a biopic - by highlighting an important figure behind an even more well-known important figure. Unfortunately, Will Smith's accent is horrendous (and they make a huge mistake by showing the real Richard talking at the end, so the audience can see just how awful this performance is. And yet, it's getting awards talk. Mind-blowing, you guys). It's also really boring when it gets to the tennis playing part (sorry, it's just such a boring sport. And I watch BASEBALL). There's also this really dramatic music and drawn out matches that are probably supposed to invoke emotion, but...why would I get emotional?? - I know how her life turns out. But, like I said, it's...an easy watch. Nothing really exciting about it, but it's a well-made movie with an interesting story. I literally know nothing about the Williams sisters. I do remember Venus being really, really popular among my peers when I was in high school. I think a lot of people seem to question Richard's motives (as if he was trying to steal the spotlight), but I think it's great that he insisted on keeping his daughters' focus on having fun and being kids. He genuinely seems to care about their well-being and I think that is rare when it comes to parents of famous children (I just read a Natalie Wood biopic this year, and let me tell you, her mother belongs in a fucking prison). 

3. Pig - I've said this before, but I'm definitely not a part of the cult of Nicolas Cage. I've liked him in many things (mostly older things like Face/Off), but his fans have this weird habit of praising everything he does - even the cheesiest c-rate garbage. I was hesitant about this, but I actually really liked it. I don't think it's, like, an award-worthy performance, as some are proclaiming. But it's solid work from Cage. And a great story - a bit like a subdued version of John Wick. I remember really wanting a pig for a pet (back in the day when George Clooney famously had a pet pig and I thought he was super cool). They are supposed to make great pets, and this sort of cements this by how deep this man loves this pig. There's some great stuff in this - particularly the contrast and reality between how the "farm to table" is often enjoyed by the super wealthy. Also, the scene where he confronts the chef in the pretentious restaurant is *chef's kiss* (pun intended). I didn't recognize Alex Wolff, because this is kind of a different role for him, at least from what I've seen. I like the relationship that evolves between him and Cage. And while the ending is obvious from the second that poor pig is kidnapped, it still hits like a gut-punch. It's currently one of my favorites of the year (but I still have SO much to see...). 

4. The Humans - I think the intent behind this movie is usually something that I enjoy - very "slice of life" storytelling, attention to details, very thoughtful camerawork, with an overall sense of dread, but overall nothing about it felt authentic or engaging at all, so to sum it up - it just doesn't work. I used to like Beanie Feldstein a whole lot, but her performance in ACS: Impeachment is atrocious, so now I actually hate her (she does sort of look like Monica Lewinsky, but it was a hard to watch series on many levels). I feel like she has to win me back after that, and unfortunately this does not do it. And why would anyone cast Feldstein and Amy Schumer as sisters?? They don't look, act, or talk alike at all. The apartment that is the setting for the entire movie is absolutely gorgeous for New York City, so it's weird that I think it's supposed to be seen as creepy and decrepit. I don't need to look at water-damaged walls and ceilings for that long - the repetitiveness is definitely a problem (also I had a water-damaged wall in my apartment in Philly and when it rained there was basically a waterfall in my apartment, but I was about two months behind on my rent at all times and my landlord never complained, so I felt it was a fair trade). Anyway, I think I'm mostly disappointed because this should be a movie that I like and it's...so flat. 

5. The Power of the Dog - Unfortunately, this just isn't my thing. I watched for Kirsten Dunst and the return of Jane Campion (I didn't realize that she was a writer/director for Top of the Lake? And now I also can't remember if I ever finished that series? It was one of those things that took ages for each series to be available in America so I might have given up?). I did NOT watch this for Benedict Cumberbatch (although, he was decent in this, and even got the accent right). It's definitely a well-made movie. Obviously there are some stunning shots and it's all very...fine. It's just not very interesting. 45 minutes in and I couldn't even tell you the plot of the movie - it's just so boring. It starts to get a little interesting towards the end, but it's basically a mix of Brokeback Mountain and Call Me By Your Name (both movies I didn't really like, but are also well-made movies). Kodi Smit-McPhee really grew up super awkward, huh? He actually looks like Benedict and could easily play his son (which is why the tension between them is awkward, in my opinion). Kirsten Dunst is great, but looks old. I mean, not OLD old, because she's 39, but it's just hard to see actresses you've watched for decades suddenly look older than they should (and I do think she looks much older than me and she's actually a year younger, but that could just be my wishful thinking. Also, I KNOW it's incredibly sexist and ageist to even bring it up, but also...it's honestly what I was thinking when I watched this, and this blog is my thoughts....so...sorry? I guess.). Jesse Plemmons is also great, but him and Benedict as BROTHERS?? What is up with casting siblings lately? I don't like Thomasin McKenzie (I know I'm a minority in that), but she has...maybe one line of dialogue?? She's miles down the cast list, too, which is super awkward with how popular she has become over the last few years (but, you know, if you're given a role in a Campion movie you take it - no matter how much of a step backwards it is in your career). Also, the score is really overwhelming and a huge distraction. I did really, really, really love the ambiguous ending (although I think the intent is very clear). It almost made me like the movie - I just wish I liked anything about the preceding two hours before it.

Holiday Movie Preview: 11 Films I'm Excited About

1. West Side Story - There are a lot of reasons to not be excited about this (for one, what's the point?), but also...it's Spielberg. And it's one of the greatest musicals of all-time. So...I'm hesitantly excited and we'll just leave it at that for now. (Also: reviews have been fairly good so far...so...maybe it is????)

2. Spider-Man: No Way Home - The hype for this is extensive, and ultimately I'm very nervous for a huge letdown, but the trailer is pretty exciting. I've liked the first two (they are adorable! Holland is adorable!). But I'm also a HUGE fan of the Maguire Spider-Man era so I think it's super cool that they are doing the whole multi-verse by using the previous films. I do think that both Maguire and Garfield make an appearance in this, and it sucks that it's so speculated because it would have been a mind-blowing surprise. But it's impossible to keeps something like that under the radar nowadays. 

3. Parallel Mothers - It's Almodovar, and I've loved every film of his that I've seen - I think the one I like the least is the most recent one, Pain and Glory, but even that is still a good film. Plus, Penelope Cruz is always at her best in Almodovar movies. 

4. Sing 2 - I think it's pretty obvious why I am excited about this movie. It's for one reason, and ONE reason only: Taron Egerton SINGING. I love his voice so much - it's so soothing and warm. I wish he would take some time off from acting and record an album. Or even better, do more musicals like Rocketman. I watched the first Sing because I got trapped in a Youtube hole for hours watching interviews of Egerton singing. His version of "I'm Still Standing" from the original is THE BEST (I actually prefer it to the Rocketman version - but I love both. How weird is it that he has two completely different covers of the same song for two different movies??). The actual movie is kind of cute. I didn't think it would be something I would remember, but I (embarrassingly) have watched this multiple times just to hear Egerton's voice, so I remember it all. The sequel looks like more of the same, but honestly I'll be super excited when the soundtrack drops so I can listen to Taron's version of "There's Nothing Holding Me Back" on repeat. 

5. Don't Look Up - Okay, I fully admit that this looks like a total disaster, but I've liked Adam McKay's films (especially The Big Short, which seems to be very uncool nowadays among film twitter, but I still love it). And that cast is just incredible - especially with Leo and Meryl in a movie together again. But as I said, especially after watching the horrendous clip released a few months ago, this does look like a total disaster. Jus smug, poorly acted and unfunny. But, I guess we'll see!

6. The Unforgivable - Sandra Bullock is back!!! I love her so much! I hate when she disappears for years at a time, but I totally respect that she tries to live a normal life in-between movies. I watched the trailer and it totally seems like a Lifetime movie but I don't even care. I can't wait. 

7. Nightmare Alley - I don't know much about this, but it's Bradley Cooper, Cate Blanchett, and Toni Collette (i.e three of my favorite actors) in a Guillermo del Toro film. Although, I've been a little disappointed by his recent films (Crimson Peak, The Shape of Water), I'm still hopeful. 

8. The King's Man - Honestly, I think Kingsman: The Secret Service is my most rewatched movie of the last decade. It's getting to the point where I can recite every line. It's genuinely entertaining, but obviously I watch it for Taron. I have watched The Golden Circle multiple times as well - but at least I can admit that it's not a good movie (parts of it are: the cast, the action sequences, Taron, etc., but structurally it's in deep need of some editing and the plot is mind-boggling). I have so much love for this franchise, though, so even though this prequel is obviously missing a huge part of my key enjoyment (TARON! And LOL at people who are genuinely mad that him and Colin aren't in this...it's A PREQUEL...how could they be in it?? I swear, I'm surrounded by idiots on the internet), I'm still invested in the mythology of it all. I also think it's kind of funny that Aaron Taylor-Johnson is in this one (he turned down the role of Eggsy - thank God!). 

9. The Lost Daughter - Olivia Colman is in my Top 10 best (living) actresses list (I don't actually have a list but if I had to list it out without putting too much thought into it, it would look like this: Cate Blanchett, Naomi Watts, Colman, Jessica Chastain, Viola Davis, Saoirse Ronan, Meryl Streep, Octavia Spencer, Emma Stone & Toni Colette. Note: this is not a list of my favorite actresses because that would include Sandy B and Margot Robbie). Colman is just incredible, so I'll watch anything with her in it, but I'm also excited for Maggie Gyllenhaal's (another terrific actress!) directorial debut. I watched the trailer and it looks a little unsettling, which is always a welcome feeling for me. 

10. The Tender Bar - I've not been the biggest fan of George Clooney's directorial efforts (I feel like he tries to copy the Coen Brothers too much and his films have been largely boring), but I think I might connect with this film a little (hopefully!). I spent a little bit of my childhood in a bar, as my grandfather owned a fairly well-known Irish pub in the town I grew up in. I have fond (and not so fond) memories of it. Also Ben Affleck is great in small dramas like this. 

11. The Tragedy of Macbeth - I think this was kind of a surprise to most film fans - I remember when the trailer was released and everyone was like - wait what is this? where did it come from? why hasn't it been reported about? It seems like Joel Coen quietly made this HUGELY famous story with HUGE stars - Denzel Washington and Francis McDormand. I've seen some mixed reactions to it, but based on everything I've seen - I think I'm going to love it??? *crosses fingers*

Thoughts on 5 Films

1. Jungle Cruise - I'm not really familiar with the Disney ride (never really been a Disney fan, to be honest - I was much more into Universal Studios and Knott's Berry Farm when I was a kid), but I was hoping for a fun family adventure movie, similar to the reboot of Jumanji (also starring The Rock), but this fell a little flat for me. It's just...okay. And that would be fine if I didn't set my expectations as high as I did. Most reviews called it fun and action-packed, but it definitely drags a lot - a 90 minute version would have been so much better. There is still a lot to like, though. I am all about The Rock doing family adventure movies - this is definitely where he shines. Emily Blunt is delightful (and probably too good for this movie?). And Jesse Plemons as the "bad guy" is absolute perfection. I do not know who Jack Whitehall is, but I looked him up and apparently he is pretty popular in the UK. He is probably the weakest link for me (which is odd because the opposite seems to be true for most reviews that I read). The cast as a whole work really well together, but there's just something so bland about it. Overall, it's just kind of a drag to sit through which is very disappointing. 

2. Red Notice - Probably too many movies starring The Rock out there, but it doesn't seem like he's going away anytime soon, so we just have to go with it at this point. The three leads are likeable enough - I've liked The Rock before, but not always. Same for Ryan Reynolds (I *still* don't understand how he got SO famous SO quickly for just having nice abs). I was more curious about Gal Gadot because I've never seen her in anything outside of Wonder Woman (except whichever Fast & Furious movie she was in that I don't remember at all). Sad to say that she was as dull as watching paint dry. I thought watching this a little tipsy would help, but it's still really boring. And it moves at a snails pace. There really isn't even anything memorable about it either. Reynolds spouts a few mildly amusing one-liners ("does the back of your head look like a huge penis?"), but ultimately it feels like a computer-generated action movie. It just pulls all these clichés together into one movie and unfolds it all as if it's going to surprise the audience. I heard about the Ed Sheeran cameo beforehand (from Netflix's twitter - because apparently they thought that would actually entice more people to watch it? I know he has a fan base - i.e my mother, who describes him as having "the voice of an angel", but I still have no idea who he is or what he sings or why he pops up in movies randomly. But then they played his song and I thought "oooooh that's what he sings??? I actually like that song, my bad" haha!), it was unnecessarily terrible. The most intriguing part of the whole movie is the line "Vin Diesel's audition for Cats...it exists!". WHAT?! Is that real or are they just a dig at Vin?? I need to know! I think it's hilarious that Netflix is pretending like this is their most watched movie...ever. Obviously, it's not, but I'm sure they spent enough money of the leads so they needed that to be true. It's also hilarious that there will most definitely be a sequel. Humanity is doomed. 

3. tick, tick...BOOM! - So, I have a lot of feelings about this movie. Overall, I will say that I liked it very much. But it is for a very specific audience and - I say this in the nicest way possible - but a lot of that "specific audience" is insufferable. Broadway musical geeks / theater nerds to be specific. Technically, I am one of them (Drama Studies major in college, but I was very much an outsider). However, I can tell you from experience that if you aren't a complete narcissist (think Lady Bird), you will be excluded from the club. I think the same thing is happening with film enthusiasts too, but I can't speak from experience as much on that one (I did double major in Drama & Film Studies, but the Film program was new so it wasn't extensive enough to have the true film "experts" in the program). The film works SO WELL for me, because I see so many theater geeks connecting to it saying "this is me!" without even realizing how self-involved and completely frantic it is. It captures not only the essence of Jonathan Larson brilliantly; it also captures a moment in time so...specifically. Rent was the Broadway musical of my generation - I think I saw it at least 5 times in the first few years it came out, and then again not that long ago (I think it was for the 20 year anniversary, maybe?). It's interesting to see Larson's process and what ultimately led him to creating one of the best musicals of all-time. But I do wonder if his feeling of running out of time was pressure from the industry or an actual premonition? And if he knew that it was happening wouldn't he want to spend it with loved ones instead of focusing all his energy on writing? Or is that the point - that he wanted to live on through his work? This obsessive need to leave something permanent in the world; to be remembered - it's all very fascinating to think about (if you're not familiar - Larson died suddenly on the opening night of Rent at the tragically young age of 35). Andrew Garfield is wonderful as Larson - and I had no idea he could sing! I do think that the film, itself, feels a little amateur and not very creative. It's clear that Lin-Manuel Miranda has a personal connection to this story, but it is missing the spark (or BOOM!, if you will). The "Sunday" scene is just spectacular, though. I plan on watching the scene again soon, because it was just so exciting to see these legendary Broadway stars - I feel like I missed some things. I wish the whole film were like this, though. Still definitely one of the best films I've seen this year, which is a lovely surprise. 

4. The Virtuoso - *major spoilers* The biggest mistake this movie makes is relying on a twist that is extremely easy to figure out very early on. It makes the whole film feel sort of pointless. I like Anson Mount a lot, and am sad that he never hit it big (yet!). And I like Abbie Cornish too (now, but I used to hate her). They are both good, but don't really have the chemistry necessary to hold the movie together. Another mistake is the narration - it's a big miss. It's very dry, monotonous and just very flat. It makes it very hard to follow the plot - it's basically just him screaming "white rivers" at everyone (literally). And the most frustrating mistake is that God-awful, embarrassing sex scene. Why must all straight sex scenes be so fucking cringey all the time?? But back to the "twist" because it's actually...really good if it wasn't so obvious. And the reveal of it is really strong - with the replay of a prior scene - showing how it was all pulled off. But here is why I knew it immediately: he says he's staying "at the motel" but never gives his room number and then she just shows up at his room. And he looks and acts like a serial killer, so no woman in their right mind would just go to this strange man's motel room...unless...she's ALSO AN ASSASSIN (dun dun dun!!!). It's just so in-your-face, that it's annoying that the audience has to wait so long for him to figure it out. I like the idea of it being more of an anthology, though. I am actually interested in watching the next "virtuoso" story, but it's a shame that will never happen. 

5. Queenpins - I really, really like Paul Walter Hauser and he's been promoting this movie like crazy, otherwise I probably never would have heard of it. It's...cute, I guess. It's also kind of cheesy (but not quite good enough to be camp). I'm not the biggest fan of Kristen Bell (I liked her in The Good Place, but it wasn't exactly a hard role for her to play); I just find her kind of annoying. BUT I was so excited to see Joel McHale in this (I really, really miss The Soup, you guys). He's definitely not in this enough. The highlights are Hauser - he was literally every LP agent I've ever come across (and I've been in retail for 20 years so I know a LOT of LP agents), and Kirby Howell-Baptiste. I think I laughed the most at her lines, but also that little dance she does in her driveway is adorable. Extreme couponing is actually a hilarious concept - but it just gets a little repetitive. It's fascinating that this is based on a real story (I looked it up - these ladies counterfeited 25 MILLION in coupons. Jesus Christ!). It's also only a 90 minute concept, so there's about 20 minutes of filler (which is why it feels repetitive). I will say that I laughed really hard at two parts - the first is when the cashier is describing Bell and says "she's like 3ft tall" (she is very tiny!), and when they are in the armored vehicle loaded with all the gear to "take down" the criminals and the one guy asks what they were dealing with - "it's two women counterfeiting coupons". The look on his face is just priceless. I would recommend it if you're in the mood for something light and amusing. 

Thoughts on 5 Films

1. Halloween Kills - I didn't think Halloween (2018) was that bad. It was stupid, but still fun to watch. But this...is horrendous. It's overwhelmingly bad. The whole "evil dies tonight" mob is one of the worst ideas I've ever seen in a horror movie. It takes vigilante justice to new heights of ridiculousness. And the acting by this mob is so overdone it becomes really laughable. Actually, I laughed a lot during this movie, but mostly at parts I probably wasn't supposed to laugh at. And also the scene where the woman hits the gun against the car door and shoots herself - I laughed so hard that tears formed in my eyes. I also think it's funny that Michael somehow overpowers a dozen or so firemen after almost dying in a fire. But other than that, it's all bad. Bad dialogue, bad acting, horrible pacing, and not enough Jamie Lee Curtis. I still think Judy Greer was a brilliant casting choice as her daughter, but man, the girl who plays her granddaughter is really awful (I don't remember her being that bad in the first one?), and the really annoying guy from You is in this too, which is weird because I watched an episode that featured him heavily directly before watching this. Anyway, I don't really have much else to say about this, but it definitely makes me weary of the next installment. 

2. Finch - Quite lovely, really. It's heartwarming and charming from beginning to end. It's nothing really new - and had quite a few elements from other apocalypse and/or robot movies (from I am Legend to Short Circuit), but there are still some wonderful moments that keep it interesting. *slight spoilers* The plot is automatically sad - this guy survives the apocalypse (from global warming), luckily he's an engineer of some sort so he builds all this technology to help keep him alive. Along the way he finds a dog (in a gut-wrenching flashback) to keep him company and give him a reason to live. He gets sick and knows he's going to die so he builds a robot to take care of the dog. If that doesn't put a lump in your throat already, then you might be more robot than human. I really liked the way the technology looked somehow advanced and homemade at the same time. The robot looks a bit like Deadpool, but like, cute. But I really hated his voice at first (he sounded like Borat!), but as he becomes more "human" his voice softens and it's really interesting. I assumed it was computerized, so I was stunned when I found out that it's CALEB LANDRY JONES!!! How weird?! Tom Hanks is incredible as expected - he just commands the screen. I mean he can make talking to a volley ball interesting, so just imagine how he interacts with a robot. And of course, the ending is predictably sad. I don't know how I made it through the fetch scene without crying (maybe...I'm a robot??). 

3. The Harder They Fall - Welp, my film of the year, so far! I was definitely not expecting it to be, and it really wasn't even on my radar until I saw a few people discuss how stylized it was. I thought it was more of a traditional Western, and those have been disappointing me lately. I think some will be quick to describe it as "Tarantino-esque" and they will be right, but it also feels really fresh and exciting. I just fell in love with it during those old-fashioned opening credits, and it kept my eyes glued to the screen for its entirety (which admittedly is very hard to do nowadays). The cast is incredible. Jonathan Majors, Idris Elba, Zazie Beetz, LaKeith Stanfield - all wonderful. The standouts for me, though, are Regina King - she's a fucking boss and I love her so damn much. And the younger kid (he's Earl from Me, Earl and the Dying Girl, which I still think should have just been Earl and the Dying Girl) - he's just brilliant. Aside from the amazing cast, there are quite a few other things I really love about this film. First, I love that it's based on real people, but just reimagined into this story of revenge. Diversity and representation is such a gigantic topic within the film industry, and I think stories like this are what's going to change the course of film history (as opposed to just taking a well-known character/story and changing the race or gender of that character/story). Tell the stories that no-one is telling instead (this is proof that they exist!). Second, the soundtrack is incredible. It's got this cool Reggae/Hip-Hop mix, which is unexpected for a Western, but also somehow works so well with the world. It's interesting that the Composer is also the Director - Jeymes Samuel (also known as "The Bullitts", and he was a Musical Consultant on The Great Gatsby which is one of my favorite soundtracks of the last decade. Actually, I only listen to three (THREE!) soundtracks from the last 10 years consistently - Gatsby, Drive, and Rocketman. I think this one will be added to the playlist). Third, as I said in the beginning, it is endlessly stylish. Circular tracking shots galore! I also love the mix of classic Western tropes like the set and costume design and plotting, while also mixing things up with the soundtrack and also THE COLORS. Instead of the typical sepia colored/ washed out look, it is very colorful and bold. There are a few misses - it does get a little slow in the middle, which could have easily been avoided with some tighter editing. And it's probably not something I would watch again, but hardly any movie is. 

4. Passing - And the film I expected to be my film of the year, or at least towards the top...disappoints me greatly. It's a solid effort, has some really lovely shots, and an interesting subject but it's so slow and a little repetitive. And I don't really feel like it ever goes deep enough. It's always weird when everyone praises a movie and you just...don't get it (the praise, I mean, not the movie. It's very easy to understand even in all of its subtlety). It's like Nomadland last year (it's well-made, but really? This is what we're giving Oscars to?). Like I said, the story is an interesting discussion on racial identity - and something not often talked about or reflected on. But the actual dialogue is so unnatural and monotonous. It's obviously a stylistic choice, but it's just not a choice I liked. It all felt so forced. Plus, that combined with the black & white, it's just really hard to pay attention to. I would love to praise Ruth Negga and Tessa Thompson because I usually adore them both, but the dialogue and tone really just ruin their performances. However, it does have a spectacular ending. I think, overall, I'm just really disappointed, which makes me criticize the film a little more harshly, but it's certainly nowhere near my Top 10. It probably sits somewhere in middle of my current 2021 rankings. 

5. Vivo - Super cute. I didn't know much about it, so as soon as it started and I heard Lin-Manuel Miranda's voice, I wanted to bang my head against the wall (soooorrrry, his voice is like nails on a chalkboard for me - especially when he "raps"). But, he actually has a decent voice for animation (when he's not singing). And actually, I could have done without the songs altogether because the "bounce to the beat of my own drum" song is absolutely painful. And it's so...aggressive? And also, I feel like being "different" is actually the cool thing now, so it's always weird to me that they keep banging on about "outcasts". Why is she an outcast? Because she dyes her hair purple and wears a tie? That is a totally normal thing for teenagers to do nowadays. ANYWAY, I also think the plot is not really something that young people will connect with...not only because it feels outdated, but because it IS actually outdated. Anyone under the age of 60 would just be like...UM TAKE A PICTURE OF THE SONG AND TEXT IT TO HER (or Whatsapp or TikTok it to her?? I don't don't know how those things work). Instead of...traversing the fucking jungle to bring her this physical copy LOL. I feel like this post is not living up to my first statement of it being "super cute", but it actually is. The idea behind it is super cute, and the characters are cute, and I laughed waaaaay too hard at the environmentally conscious young girl berating the man for using a plastic bag ("I'm not a bad man, I just want a cookie"), and then again for driving his car two miles. I mean, I laughed so hard I had to pause the movie. Seriously, so hilarious. Anyway, I don't think it's something I'll remember too much years from now, but it was fun to watch. 

Thoughts on 5 Films

1. Zola - The story behind this movie is WILD - and I don't mean the plot. I mean the fact that it's based off of a Twitter thread consisting of 148 tweets. I have so many questions??? But my first one is who in their right mind would read a 148 tweet thread? I give up after like 5 max. The whole point of Twitter is that it's quick thoughts - NOT an entire story. Anyway, it's fascinating that this film was made because the story isn't all that interesting. But it's told really well - and I think that's the lesson that we can take away from this. People constantly argue about originality and stories that have depth, but in reality as long as a story is told well it can literally be about anything, and very simple, and still seem really interesting. My second question: is any of this being investigated? If even 25% of this story is true then hopefully authorities got involved and helped this woman who is being forced into prostitution? I don't really feel like looking into it, but I'm so sad for this woman if this is true - even though I'm pretty sure she's supposed to be seen as villainous. Other than that, I will say that I enjoyed this movie. It shouldn't work, but it totally does. Riley Keough is perfection. I know that her character is obviously annoying and grating, but there is still something so lovable and naïve about her - and she straddles that line wonderfully. She's also very funny - the part of the story where it tells "her side" is hilarious ("I fuck with Jesus" LOL). Taylour Paige is gorgeous and also does a wonderful job with making this character somewhat believable. AND Cousin Greg! Will he ever be able to overcome his Cousin Greg status?? It's become iconic, really. Also weird that I just watched another movie with him in it shortly before watching this (the Poltergeist remake. It was terrible, obviously). I didn't realize just how tall he is (6'7" Jesus Christ!). I think the biggest success, though, is the editing and ethereal aesthetic - it feels like a dream or like a fairytale gone wrong. Reminiscent of the directing styles of Harmony Korine and Sean Baker, but still feels original and fresh. 

2. Dune - I think my feelings can be summed up by the Reductress headline: Will I Understand Dune If I Don't Give a Shit? The answer is Yes, obviously - it's not that difficult. At least not as difficult as I was always led to believe. I watched the Lynch one when I was a kid (maybe 13 ish?) and I remember not understanding anything, but I also did not care (and I might not have watched the whole thing?). And then I watched that miniseries Children of Dune during my huge James McAvoy obsession (I'm still in love with him, but when I first became obsessed I watched his entire filmography - at least anything that was available in the U.S) and it was terrible. I bought a special edition copy of the novel, but have yet to bring myself to actually read it. But watching this, I was sort of stunned by how minimal and simple it actually is, and I definitely went into this not giving a shit. And, honestly, it's a bit disappointing. It might be beautiful to look at (as expected), but this story could have definitely been told in 1/2 the time and would have avoided the need for a Part II. It's just all soooo dragged out, for really no reason at all. I think it's pretty obvious that a big part of my enjoyment of films depends on the casts, and this one definitely falls short for me. I do not see what people see in Timothee Chalamet. He was good in Call Me By Your Name (a movie that I don't even really like) and okay in Lady Bird, but I've never seen him do anything that warrants all of this praise or deserving of all these big roles (and I feel like there are at least one of these four actors in every movie: Chalamet, Oscar Isaac, Benedict Cumberbatch, Adam Driver. It's getting so annoying). He was so dull in this movie - just no charisma at all (and on a side note: when I said to my boyfriend "I don't understand why so many people think he's hot", he responded "well I don't think you're supposed to find him hot, that would be gross", "what, why?", "because he's like 16", "he's 25", "what?! holy shit...that little guy right there is 25?!" Haha! It is disturbing, though, that his mother is played by someone YOUNGER than me. I cry thinking about it.). I saw a lot of praise for Jason Momoa, and I agree - he's definitely one of the stronger performances, but he's also barely in it. The only real standout is Rebecca Ferguson, who is actually in it way more than I was expecting. I know people were disappointed with Zendaya's minimal appearance, but I'm sure she's going to be in Part II heavily (which may be a good or bad thing, I haven't decided yet). The problem is that I just dread sitting through more of this. I just honestly don't give a shit. 

3. The Photograph - I love Issa Ray so fucking much. I recently started Insecure (I'm on season 3 now) and it is hilarious. I also love LaKeith Stanfield, but I'm really just here for Kelvin Harrison Jr. He's wonderful, but sadly has a minimal role in this film. It's not a new concept - in fact, I feel like I *just* sat through this story with The Last Letter from Your Lover, a movie that I surprisingly enjoyed (two people research into an old love letter/photograph and then fall in love themselves - bringing together a "circle of love" fairytale type romance). Unfortunately, I found this movie very, very slow. There's also very little chemistry or passion among the lead actors so I never fully invest in the present day love story. I also think the casting is just a bit off - the younger and older Isaac look absolutely nothing alike, which kind of confused me for a second and I thought I was missing something from the plot. And Chelsea Peretti is an odd choice for this "high powered female boss" role - she's too funny and sarcastic to be taken seriously. And on a minor nitpicking note: it's clear that they used old stock footage of London because Big Ben isn't covered in scaffolding (it was when I was there in 2018 and I'm fairly certain it still is, but either way this movie was filmed in 2019 and it definitely was still then). Maybe just don't use Big Ben? There are plenty of other landmarks that one would identify as London. Like I said minor nitpicking, but I think it speaks volumes to the movie that I was so bored that I focused on nonsense like this instead of the story sweeping me into its romance. 

4. Night Teeth - Luckily, I saw a warning that the heavily promoted stars of the movie, Megan Fox and Sydney Sweeney are not actually in the movie very much, otherwise I would have been highly disappointed. I get why they are advertised as the attractions of the film but they barely grace the screen for 5 full minutes, so that's not really fair to the audience. Otherwise, this movie is kind of fun in parts, but mostly a little too repetitive and dull. I'm a big fan of vampire stories and I appreciate that this is combined with a gang war story with a film noir vibe (it's reminiscent of From Dusk Till Dawn, but I hesitate to make the comparison because that might imply that it's better than it is). I think this might have been better as a mini-series or even a multi-season show because there are a lot of great characters and world building happening, a lot of different avenues could have been explored, but the focus is mostly on the two main vampires and their driver, clumsily discovering who they are. I really enjoyed Debby Ryan in this role - she is really beautiful and charming (and that rose gold hair is perfection!), but I thought the other girl was a misfire. She over-acted in most scenes and I'm not sure why her hair and outfit were so 80s styled? I thought they were going to like a costume party at first. What a weird choice? Anyway, there is potential in this, but it falls slightly short for me. 

5. The Night House - *spoilers* I went into this pretty much blind - I only knew that it starred Rebecca Hall and that's honestly enough for me. I had a few hesitations in the beginning ("UGH is this about ghosts??" or "OH NO it's going to be just like Intrusion, right?"), but I'm glad that they subsided once the story starts to kick in (It is kind of about ghosts and it also has some really coincidental similarities to Intrusion - lots of dudes building their own houses nowadays...huh? - but it is thankfully very different and it's actually closest to Final Destination, which is a very intriguing but unexpected premise). I really liked it. Right now it's in my Top 10 of 2021 (I'm counting this as 2021 even though it premiered at Sundance in 2020 - the release to the rest of the world was delayed until this year), but I don't think it will sit there for long. Rebecca Hall is incredible, as expected. And I think the story does a great job at keeping the audience invested enough to keep guessing what is going on. It gets much weirder than I was expecting (again, think Final Destination "you can't escape death" story), and they somehow *big spoiler* made the fact that her husband is a serial killer "but he did it out of love" actually believable? and you kind of sympathize with him??? which is very weird, but I appreciate flipping the narrative on its ass like that. Also, even though they make the house super creepy, a big house on a lake is the dream right there. I went to a party at a house like this about 5 years ago, with a motorized deck that you can take out on the lake and I've literally dreamed about it since. I don't even care if it's haunted or whatever, I'll take it. 

Fall Movie Preview: 9 Films I'm Excited About

It's been a long time since I've done a preview post because everything got so fucked up with movie releases during Covid - it seemed pointless to talk about something and then have it pushed back a year. But, somehow, things seem to be getting back to normal and most of the releases seem locked in (*crosses fingers and toes*). So, here is what I'm looking forward to this Fall: 

1. Spencer - I've stated it on here before, but as a reminder, I am super fascinated with Princess Diana. I idolized her, just like a lot of young girls my age did. I've been majorly disappointed in the way she's been portrayed in movies/tv - and I don't think anyone has gotten her essence right. I'm hopeful for this. Kristen Stewart is an inspiring choice, and it seems from the early reviews that she's an Oscar shoo-in. Also, from what I've seen, the costume design is stunning. But, it's from the same director as Jackie and I didn't love that. So, I'm cautiously excited for this. 

2. Last Night in Soho - I've already seen a lot of mixed reviews and many critics have expressed disappointment, but I'm still excited about this. I'm a big fan of Edgar Wright and I love how different this feels from his usual projects. The trailer is absolutely perfect with the haunting version of "Downtown". I love Anya Taylor-Joy, but I've never liked Thomasin McKenzie, though (and actually I've found her to be the worst part of every movie she is in, but I am definitely a minority in this thought. No surprise there, really). It looks like it has the perfect amount of suspense mixed with film noir vibes. 

3. The French Dispatch - I'm not always the biggest Wes Anderson fan (in fact, I've hated a few of his most loved films *ahem* Moonrise Kingdom *cough* The Grand Budapest Hotel *ahem*), but he's got a certain style that I admire and I've enjoyed some of his films (it's been a while, though). The cast of this (as in most of his movies) is incredible, so I'm in whether I like it or not. 

4. Eternals - For the most part, the trailers have been super boring. But the cast is great, and that's hard to ignore. Salma Hayek is stunning, but she's also 55 and Mexican, so not exactly you're typical superhero (the times they are a-changin' and it is GLORIOUS). Barry Keoghan has given some incredible performances, so I'm excited to see him in something more mainstream. And Richard Madden gets to keep his Scottish accent!!! Fucking YES! Plus, Gemma Chan, Angelina Jolie, Brian Tyree Henry- just such a stacked cast (I'm ignoring that Kit Harrington is in it. He can't act for shit, what the fuck? I thought he would disappear after GoT). I probably won't see this in a theater (actually I probably won't go to the theater at all this year, but we'll see), but I'm still somewhat excited about this. 

5. House of Gucci - I'm trying to go in a little blind on this one - I have not watched the trailer, and have only seen a few of the production still images which look great. Plus, it's Ridley Scott. And Lady Gaga really impressed me in A Star is Born (not so much in AHS, though). 

6. Red Notice - While this looks incredibly dumb, it also looks like a fun action movie with three very charismatic lead actors. That's really all I need sometimes. And I appreciate that it's streaming on Netflix right away, so I don't have to wait like I do for most of the others in this post. 

7. Belfast - I don't know much about this, but have seen a few critics say that it's their favorite of the year so far. Jamie Dornan has been acing every role lately (I mean, even the crazy bee guy is memorable). Also, I'm interested in Kenneth Branagh's writing efforts because I think the only films he's written are all adapted from Shakespeare? I'm sure it will still have Shakespearian affection. 

8. Passing - Excited for Rebecca Hall's directorial debut! And Ruth Negga & Tessa Thompson are both incredible actresses. I think the story sounds pretty interesting too, and relevant even though it takes place in the 1920s. 

9. Licorice Pizza - This is another one that I'm going to try to go in blind for - so far I've avoided the trailer (but I did see pretty much everyone raving about it). I think I now consider myself a PTA fan, since I absolutely love 3 out of his last 4 films (and 2 of them I would even consider masterpieces, which is rare for me to say). And obviously, I love Bradley Cooper, but you knew that already. 

Thoughts on 5 Films

1. Till Death - *some slight spoilers* Ok, I actually really liked this. It reminded me a little bit of Ready or Not (which I LOVED) - just the vibe of it is the same and I totally dig it. I've always loved Megan Fox. She's obviously hot, but I also just think that she's a lot of fun. She doesn't take herself too seriously, and she chooses roles that she can handle. I do question her life choices a bit when she dates someone who calls himself "Machine Gun Kelly" (don't get me started), and she's oddly thrusting her relationship in very public ways a' la the Kardashians, but I'm pretending like it's not happening. There are a few reasons that I like this movie, but I think the biggest is that I had no idea what was going to happen. The first 25 minutes are pretty straightforward, but still super creepy and I thought it was going to be a pretty obvious domestic abuse type thriller. But the plot turns into something super interesting (and actually original? I think? The closest I can compare it to is Saw, but just in the way that it's about being trapped and trying to figure out how to escape). I also like that she's not complacent - she continuously is thinking of ways to escape. My brain did exactly the same thing that hers did - grab the phone first even though it's likely to be dead given the circumstances and then try to shoot the handcuffs off. They did a really good job of making her feel truly trapped (the only other thing that I could think of is that there are pictures on the wall which means there are nails that she could have used to pick the lock on the handcuffs. Also, one can still drive on a flat tire - it will fuck up the car, but if there is an emergency it can be done). It is pretty dumb how stunning she looks through the entire movie - when she has blood splattered all over her face - it's nicely lined up with her hairline so it doesn't mess up her perfect hair, and then she washes the blood off her face and magically still has makeup on! And it's obvious that the weird steel necklace is an important link to the story, but overall I found it super suspenseful and a lot of fun. The credits are stunning, too. 

2. Black Widow - I have to say, I was definitely not expecting to enjoy this as much as I did. Aside from not really liking any recent Marvel stuff (I think the last thing I really enjoyed was Spider-Man: Far From Home), actually really not liking Captain Marvel (just so pandering), and continually thinking that Black Widow is the weakest link of The Avengers (what does she...do, exactly?), I also don't really like Scarlett Johansson in this role. So, I obviously went into this with super low expectations, which might have actually helped my enjoyment of it (?). I will still assert that Black Widow seems pointless in relation to the rest of The Avengers, and I still don't really like the character or Scarlett in the role. But I do love me some Russian spy adventures, and this felt way more in that genre than a comic book movie. I remember when this was released, everyone praising Florence Pugh's performance as Yelena, and even though I like Florence, I was skeptical of all the praise (again, I like her a lot - she was great in Midsommar and Fighting with My Family, but then she got NOMINATED FOR AN OSCAR for a wildly mediocre performance in Little Women so it's hard to trust the praise sometimes), but she absolutely killed it. She's smart, funny, witty, charming, while also being brutal and cold - pretty much everything that Black Widow should be. My eyes were glued to her in every scene. I also love Rachel Weisz and David Harbour. They all had great chemistry together and made the movie a lot of fun to watch. I still have a few problems with it - I'm not sure why the child version of Scarlett looks absolutely nothing like her (that's just such a weird choice?), and that Nirvana cover in the beginning is horrendous and made me want to die (and there is NO WAY Kurt Cobain would want his song in a fucking Marvel movie for fuck sake, have some respect). The family dinner scene is also waaaaaaay too drawn out - I was having a lot of fun with it and then this scene happened and it just drags the whole movie down before it picks back up again. The good definitely outweighs the bad, though, and I think that says a lot coming from someone who has been consistently critical of Black Widow. 

3. The Courier - As I said above, super into Russian spy adventures - but definitely Cold War stuff if it's done well (like The Americans not like Tinker, Tailor, Snooze-fest). I do not, however, like Benedict Cumberbatch. Actually, that's not completely true - I've liked him before, but I just feel like he plays the same character in everything so he gets over-praised. He's in pretty much everything so he's hard to ignore, unfortunately. Plus, this has Rachel Brosnahan (I'm a big fan after watching I'm Your Woman, but definitely after watching The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel - she's incredible) and Jessie Buckley (I was a big fan after Wild Rose, but I actually haven't liked her in anything else since). They are both under-used (which is expected, I think). This is an incredible true story, though. Just absolutely fascinating to watch this "normal" business-man turn into a spy who helped diffuse the Cuban Missile Crisis. I think sometimes it's hard to make things like this intense because it's just a lot of information being secretly passed back and forth - just over and over again, but they did a good job keeping me invested and then it actually gets really, really intense (I'm glad I didn't know the full story before watching it because I definitely wasn't expecting the last 30 minutes). If you're a fan of the genre, then you'll definitely like this. 

4. Voyagers - Well I didn't think there would be a worse sci-fi than Chaos Walking this year, but this one somehow is. It's pretty much "Lord of the Flies", but in space (which if you say out loud, it sounds awesome, but it's not). It's embarrassingly unoriginal and incredibly predictable. I watched this for Colin Farrell (obviously), but he's not in it very much, so it relies heavily on Tye Sheridan and unfortunately he just doesn't have "it". I thought he did - he was great in Mud and Ready Player One, but he's been given ample opportunities to prove himself and he just keeps falling short. But even worse, I can't believe that THAT'S Fionn Whitehead, because I was stunned by how terrible this performance is and *knew* that he seemed familiar, only to realize that he's the kid from Dunkirk - what in the actual fuck??? He was so good in Dunkirk! And then to top it off, Lily-Rose Depp is as dull as a rock. It's a shame, because it does have potential. The concept for sci-fi stories don't necessarily need to be original, there is still a lot to say with this whole idea of "mob mentality" and how humans react during lawlessness instances, but I'm not sure this movie says anything interesting (although, I think they are convinced they are being edgy by pretty much saying that young men are instinctively rapists). And I think the "good" versus "bad" is over-emphasized by having the "bad guy" be super creepy right from the very beginning. Side note: That's a gorgeous poster, and very misleading as to what the movie is actually about. 

5. There's Someone Inside Your House - I like a few things about this movie - first, it feels very late 90s horror with the beginning taking a nod from Scream and then the local teenagers being hunted one by one with their "secrets" being revealed with a similar vibe to I Know What You Did Last Summer. And there are some really good kills (slicing the achilles tendon, the knife through the mouth - all super cringe-worthy and gory). The concept of the killer wearing a mask of the victim's face is also a super creepy idea, but it is not executed well at all because the masks look absolutely nothing like the person - so it's kind of awkward (they obviously knew they failed, so they had to explain who it was supposed to be in each sequence LOL). The cast is tolerable, but they all sort of look like a more famous actor (I've mistaken Theodore Pellerin for Keir Gilchrist before, but they also have the main girl who looks like Shay Mitchell, along with a Ryan Gosling doppelganger). I think the downfall is that it just falls into certain horror clichés that have all been done (better) by other movies. It's also just dumb that they would still have a "big game" when teenagers are being hunted by a serial killer. And it tries to be profound by proclaiming that the whole "mask" concept is referencing how everyone "wears a mask" to hide from their true selves (via social media, etc.), but it's kind of laughable at how direct it is (I think the audience...you know...gets it? It's not that complicated of a concept). The title doesn't really make sense, either, does it? Other than the first scene, none of it takes place in someone's home. It should really be titled "There's Someone Inside Your Face" - that's much more intriguing, right??? (yes, I do realize why they couldn't call it that). 

Thoughts on 5 New TV Shows

1. Only Murders in the Building - Definitely the best new series I've seen in a while. I just love everything about it, but the best part is that each episode is better than the last. I'm 5 episodes in and all have been not only well-written, but also incredibly memorable in a very specific way. I really like how the mystery is unfolding with each episode focusing on a new "suspect" and then gives a cute little "twist" at the end (and OMG the suspect at the end of the third episode had me dying). The chemistry between the well established comedic duo, Martin Short and Steve Martin, and Selena Gomez is strangely perfect. You don't expect it to work, but the charisma between Short and Martin combined with the dry line delivery of Gomez is honestly brilliant. I like Selena Gomez a lot; she was great in The Dead Don't Die and seems like she doesn't take herself too seriously, but I've also seen her give an absolutely horrendous performance in Monte Carlo (that I watched for Cory Monteith and Cory Monteith only, I swear). There's also great gags that focus on the generational gap among them that are super cute and sometimes laugh out loud funny, but also not overdone. Actually, I think that's what makes the whole thing work - there is a perfect balance of everything. Also, I thought I would be turned off by the "True Crime" podcast aspect, but it's done well. I'm not really a fan - I don't like podcasts at all, actually, but I find the whole idea of obsessing over murders to be incredibly disrespectful to victims and their families (I don't think all of them are like this - but I was stuck listening to one at work that literally had the hosts describe their own outfit and tell each other how cute they looked, and then continued to talk about the mental state of a murderer in the same breath. It was the dumbest fucking thing I've ever heard. I think it was called "My Favorite Murder", too, which is absolutely disgusting). Anyway, I can't wait to watch more episodes (I'm pacing myself but it's definitely an easy show to binge though, if that's how you prefer to watch things). 

2. The Mosquito Coast - Considering the track record of Apple TV+ series, I had really high expectations for this. Plus, that cast! Justin Theroux and Melissa George!! Wow (and they are both Alias alumni. LOVE IT)!! It's definitely the weakest of their shows, so far, but that's up against shows like For All Mankind, Mythic Quest, Dickinson, and Ted Lasso, so that's not necessarily a bad thing. It's still a strong show - it just isn't as consistent as those previously mentioned. I think my biggest issue is that it just gets a little too unbelievable. In real life, the whole family would have been dead multiple times, but instead they just kept getting extremely lucky and it became really frustrating to watch. But the story is really good, the acting is obviously great, and I actually gasped at some of the shots (the close-up of the eye with the fly and the reflection of the figure walking is absolutely stunning - like Breaking Bad level good). I'm also really intrigued as to where the story is going to go in season two - so overall, it's a successful show. 

3. Scenes From a Marriage - I still have one episode left of this miniseries, but I'm definitely not in love with it. So far, I only really liked one episode (the second one), and the rest have had some good moments but overall have been a drag to sit through. I wrote *so many* notes while watching each episode, but ultimately it's all saying the same thing: marriage is awful and dumb and why do people do this to themselves? The statistic given that the average marriage only lasts 8.2 years is mind-blowing (first, is it real? I'm too lazy to look it up. Second, I'm assuming it's a statistic for America? I don't remember if they clarified that). I think the biggest issue that I have with the series is that it does nothing new - it depicts marriage the same way so many other stories do, featuring two people who clearly do not belong together. And it's not in the "opposites attract" sort of way, instead it's that these two people have completely different values and expectations - with religion, sex, raising/having children, communication, etc. It doesn't make me interested in their relationship at all because it's just so obvious that they should get divorced. And, ultimately they should never have been married to begin with. I would rather see a marriage struggle between two people who actually belong together and have the story show me why it's still worth fighting for. It's so naïve to believe that it will be easy to spend your life with the same person just because you're...in love? Anyway, I could go into depth about all the details and dialogue that frustrate me, but again it just boils down to marriage being dumb and I don't want to keep repeating myself. Also, it's no surprise to me that I side with the male perspective because I usually do, but it's even more obvious with this - she's supposed to be awful...right? And not just because she cheats, but because she's a selfish, manipulative bitch (it's way too difficult to write women as powerful and ambitious and kind. I know, I know). I do love Jessica Chastain so much, though. She's incredible in this. And her and Oscar Isaac have clear chemistry that make them a very believable couple. I'm not a huge fan of Oscar Isaac - I'm not not a fan, though. I just don't see how he has such a big following (I put him in the same category as Adam Driver and Timothee Chalamet, as actors who are waaaay over-praised). They make the series seem more interesting than it is. But if they end up back together in the last episode, I'm going to be so pissed off. 

4. American Rust - Solid slow-burn drama series, with a fantastic cast, that nobody seems to be talking about? It's so oddly under the radar, overwhelmed by the popularity of Squid Game and Midnight Mass (literally the only two shows I see everyone talk about). Jeff Daniels and Maura Tierney are incredible - and I feel like they have the vibe that Kate Winslet was going for in Mare of Easttown, but couldn't quite pull it off (sorry, I still don't get the overwhelming praise for her performance. It was so inconsistent!). It gets everything right about "small town America" while most shows attempting this fall into depressing clichés. I also like how the "mystery" is slowly unfolding - while it's still essentially "slow-burn", something important to the story happens with each episode so I don't feel like they are wasting time, but they are also not going to do some big "twist" ending. It's adding to the depth of the characters and the layers in the story, instead. Overall, I highly recommend it. 

5. The Wonder Years - I think, in theory, I should like this sitcom. But sadly, it just doesn't work for me. Sitcoms are really hard to make work nowadays - especially classic family oriented sitcoms (I think the only one I still watch is The Goldbergs, which is still pretty good although its concept is wearing thin). The original series is absolutely wonderful and I kind of new that a reboot would never be capable of capturing all the things that made the original so special. But, I think the biggest reason that this doesn't work is the timing of it - the whole "nostalgia" factor is missing. When the original aired it took place 20 years prior, but as a kid I could still relate to Kevin (as different as things were, many things were still the same), where as this reboot still takes place in 1968 - which feels like a different planet from modern day. I'm just not sure who the audience is? Because in 1988 - the audience was everyone (although in retrospect it's a mostly white audience), but I just can't see anyone under 50 connecting with this. And while it can still feel relevant when it comes to race relations - it's also extremely obvious in the way each episode seems set to "solve" things (oh look the black team and the white team played a game together. Racism is solved!). I do think it's smart to reimagine the series through the eyes of a black family during the same time period, it obviously offers a layer that wasn't there originally, but it's just lost all subtlety. I'm going to keep watching and hoping for improvement because I'm fully aware that sometimes it takes sitcoms a little while to find their footing and that could be the case for this.